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BONDAGE & DISCIPLINE
About
BDSM (Bondage, Discipline, Sadism, Masochism) |
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NOTICE-DISCLAIMER: Information found here is for
entertainment purposes only and is not intended to be instructional.
Neither Wikipedia nor Passions Unchained can be held liable for any
individual or individuals that engage in any type of bondage,
discipline, sadomasochism, sadism, masochism, sadistic behavior,
masochistic behavior, bondage position(s), or any other type of sexual
activity whether described in this website or otherwise. Bondage,
discipline, sadism, and masochism activities, whether involving sex
or sexual activity or not may involve some risk of injury. Always use
common sense when engaging in any type of bondage, discipline, sadistic,
or masochistic behavior. People with physical or mental limitations of
any kind should not engage in any type of bondage, discipline, sadistic,
masochistic, or sadomasochistic activities without first consulting
their doctor. |
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NEVER MAKE OR USE
HOME MADE BONDAGE EQUIPMENT!! |
| Many people
that have chosen to make their own BDSM equipment have become
seriously injured. We
DO NOT recommend individuals make their own bondage and discipline gear as serious
and permanent injury may
result, including death. DO NOT
use common rope, neckties, or other items not specifically
designed for BDSM to bind another persons limbs or extremities
as knots may tighten and become difficult to remove. There
are restraints and ropes designed for BDSM that can be quickly &
easily removed.
Extreme caution should always be used in any type of head or suspension bondage.
When purchasing bondage and discipline sex gear or sadism and
masochism sex toys always follow the manufacturers recommendations,
instructions and safety warnings. |
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Domination and
submission
Domination and submission (also known as D&s, Ds or D/s) is a
set of behaviors, customs and rituals relating to the giving and
accepting of dominance of one individual over another in an
erotic or lifestyle context.
Physical contact is not a necessity, and it can even be
conducted anonymously over telephone, email or instant messaging
services. In other cases it can be intensely physical, sometimes
traversing into sadomasochism. In D/s, one takes pleasure or
erotic enjoyment out of either dominating or being dominated.
Those who take the superior position are called dominants, doms
(male) or dommes (female), while those who take the subordinate
position are called submissives or subs (male or female). A
switch is an individual who plays in either role. Two switches
together may negotiate and exchange roles several times in a
session. "Dominatrix" is a term usually reserved for a female
professional dominant who dominates others for pay.
Some people maintain a special room or area, called a dungeon,
which contains special equipment (shackles, handcuffs, whips,
queening stools and spanking benches or a Berkley horse, for
example) used for play scenes, or they may visit a BDSM club
that maintains such facilities.
Overview
Dominance and submission, and the inner conflict and surrender
connected with these are enduring themes in human culture and
civilization. Human beings share with many other mammals the
instinct to look up to certain individuals who become leaders
through strength of will and personality, to lead or follow, and
to submit or dominate. In human sexuality this has broadened to
include mutual exploration of roles, emotions and activities
which would be difficult or impossible to do without a willing
partner taking an opposing role.
While D/s deals with representations of brutality and cruelty,
and the emotional responses to them, adherents are quick to
point out that D/s is not about actual acts of brutality and
cruelty. It is a consensual power exchange between the two
partners and need not involve any brutality (such as corporal
punishment) or cruelty (verbal or emotional abuse) at all. It is
primarily based upon trust and communication between the
partners. It is also based on a deep ethos of mutual respect in
which exploration of the emotions brought up by brutality and
cruelty can take place in a safe, sane and consensual manner.
Terminology
D/s participants often refer to their activity as "play", with
an individual play session called a "scene". The term "top" is
equivalent to dominant while the term "bottom" is equivalent to
submissive. Another term that is one the same vein is “switch”,
a switch is someone who will change from top to bottom in
different scenes or with different partners.
“Cuckhold” refers to voyeurism, a cuckhold relationship
encompasses more than 2 members, it can be of same sex or both
sexes. Cuckhold relationships may be formed of a set group of
members or the dominant may allow anyone to use his or her
partner.
The term “vanilla” refers to the normal, Vanilla sex being
normal sex or the vanilla world being normal society. The term
comes from vanilla ice cream -being the 'default' flavour.
Relationships
In some D/s relationships a partner only submits occasionally
and with definite short-term goals, perhaps for an evening or
the duration of a party.
In other relationships, there may be an ongoing (not scene- or
play-specific) power exchange between or among partners in a
committed relationship, often involving love and servitude and
enacted in ways throughout the relationship. Some D/s
relationships may be compared to the idealized marriages
portrayed in older television programs, in which one partner is
domestic and service-oriented and the other partner is the
provider, protector, and household authority. BDSM may otherwise
be deliberately and consciously incorporated into the
relationship, or it may focus wholly on power exchange.
Some people may opt for the master or mistress/slave model, in
which consent is negotiated once for a long period and the
consent given is generally broader. Slave contracts may be used.
Where the contract is in effect continuously, the relationship
is referred to as "24/7". The limits of the slave contract can
vary widely and extend into other areas of BDSM. Some people opt
to be purely "sex slaves", while others who prefer domestic
service identify as "service slaves". Some slaves allow their
masters or mistresses complete latitude as to the demands that
can be placed on them. Such a relationship is known as total
power exchange or TPE.
People usually only enter into a master/slave contract after
they have known and played with each other for some time, often
several years. It can be one of the most difficult relationships
in the BDSM world to maintain, and requires special skills and
experience.
Myths
Common myths about D/s:
Dominants are naturally cruel people.
Submissives are naturally weak-willed "doormats."
Submissives are attempting to re-live childhood abuse.
Women who are into D/s are nymphomaniacs, or indiscriminate sex
partners.
D/s is usually a case of "role-reversal" with people who have
much power and responsibility in real life often preferring a
submissive role.
There is little or no
factual evidence to support any of these concepts; submissives
and dominants come from a broad spectrum of society and most
people into BDSM are very selective about who they play with.
Considering the risks, this is not surprising. The idea that
submissive women are sexually indiscriminate likely stems from
pornographic fiction and the appeal of an insatiable partner who
will do anything one commands. In real life this is rarely the
case.
Dr. Michael J. Bader, author of Arousal: The Secret Logic of
Sexual Fantasies, writes: "It is quite common that children who
were abused grow up and develop sexual fantasies loosely based
on their abuse. ... The adult indulging in a fantasy of sexual
surrender or abasement is actually saying to her or himself:
'I'm recreating a terrifying or traumatic scene, but this time
I'm in control because I'm scripting the scene ...'" [1]
1. Bader, Michael J. (2002).
Arousal: The Secret Logic of Sexual Fantasies (1st ed.). New
York:St. Martin's Press pp. 112-113 ISBN 0-312-26933-1
The "role-reversal" myth likely stems from studies done in the
1950's which found that most of the clients in houses of
domination were wealthy, powerful men. This is probably more due
to the high fees charged in such houses (often $200-$5,000 a
session) than a dearth of impoverished submissives. There are
many poor submissives and wealthy dominants.
Some linguistic conventions
Some people in the D/s world capitalize words and names that
refer to dominants, and not to capitalize those that refer to
submissives, hence the capitalization of D/s; others do not. It
was popularized on internet chatrooms, to make it easier to
identify the orientation of the writer or the person being
written about.
Also, some submissives eschew personal pronouns, instead
referring to themselves as "this slave" or "Master Bob's girl".
This is sometimes considered an expression of modesty, but it is
an entirely optional method of depersonalizing a submissive
during "play". It may have roots in the military, where new
soldiers are required to refer to themselves as "this recruit"
rather than "I" or "me".
BDSM & Fetishes
BDSM and a Sexual Fetish is not the same thing. While BDSM deals
with a wide variety of dominance and submissivness, sexual
fetishism is the sexual attraction for material and terrestrial
objects while in reality the essence of the object is inanimate
and sexless. Body parts may also be subject to sexual fetishes
(also known as partialism) in which the preferred body part for
the fetishist takes a sexual precedent over the owner. Sexual
fetishism may be regarded as a disorder of sexual preference, or
as an enhancing element to a relationship.[1]
The concept has its origins in the 18th century with Charles de
Brosses' theory of fetishism as a primary stage in the evolution
of a religion[2],
and from the advent of psychosexual/psychodynamic theories of
society and individuals in 19th century Europe by (amongst
others) psychologist Alfred Binet, German philosopher Max
Dessoir, [3]and
Sigmund Freud.[4]
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ABOUT BDSM
BDSM is the collective term for a group of related sexual
preferences common in issue-related literature, which are sometimes
inaccurately referred to as D/s, sadomasochism, or S&M (also written
S-and-M).
The term "BDSM" is an abbreviation derived from the terms bondage and
discipline, domination and submission and sadism and masochism. It
defines a spectrum of usually sexual behavior, that can include
dominance, submission, punishment, masochism, bondage, role play and a
large variety of other activities.
BDSM can also be referred to as "kinky sex", "power exchange", "fetish",
"SexMagick" or "the lifestyle".
Fundamentals
Many variations of BDSM involve one partner voluntarily giving up
control. The submissive partner gives control to the dominant partner in
a ritualized interaction known as power exchange. The dominant partner
is referred to as the "Dom", "Dominant", or "top" and the submissive
partner is called "sub", "submissive", or "bottom". In accordance with
the commonly-used nomenclature in issue-related discussions among the
practitioners, this article will use the terms Top and Bottom to
describe the particular role-playing partner.
BDSM actions often take place during a specific period of time agreed to
by both parties, referred to as "play", "a scene" or "a session". All
parties involved usually derive pleasure from this, even though many of
the practices that are performed, such as inflicting pain, humiliation
or being restrained would be considered unpleasant under normal
circumstances. Sexual intercourse, oral, anal or vaginal may occur
within a session, but is not essential.[1]
The fundamental principles for the exercise of BDSM require that it
should be performed by mature and responsible partners, of their own
volition, and in a safe way. Since the 1980s, these basic principles
have been condensed into the motto "safe, sane and consensual",
abbreviated as SSC, which means that everything is based on safe, sane
and consenting behavior of all involved parties.[2]
This mutual consent makes a clear legal and ethical distinction between
BDSM and crimes such as sexual assault or domestic violence.[3]
Some BDSM practitioners prefer a code of behavior that differs from
"SSC" and described as Risk Aware Consensual Kink (RACK), indicating a
preference of a style in which the individual responsibility of the
involved parties is emphasized more strongly, with each participant
being responsible for his or her own well-being. RACK focuses primarily
upon awareness and informed consent, rather than accepted safe
practices.[4]
Consent is the most important criterion here as well.
The consent and compliance for a sadomasochistic situation can be
granted only by people who are able to judge the potential results. For
their consent, they must have all relevant information at hand and the
necessary mental capacity to judge. The resulting consent and
understanding is often summarized in a "contract",[5]
an agreement of what can and cannot take place.
In general, it must be possible for the consenting partner to withdraw
his or her consent at any given time;[6]
for example, by using a safeword that was agreed on in advance.[7][8]
Failure to honor a safeword is considered the most serious misconduct
that can take place in BDSM and can even change the sexual consent
situation into a crime, depending on the relevant law,[9]
since the bottom has explicitly revoked his or her consent to any
actions which follow the use of the safeword
Safety
The riding crop is often regarded as a classical symbol of domination.
Its safe application requires motor skills and basic anatomical
knowledge.
Aside from the general advice related to Safer Sex, BDSM sessions often
require a much wider array of safety precautions than typical Vanilla
Sex (sexual behavior without BDSM elements).[10]
To keep all acts within the framework agreed upon by all participants, a
commonly accepted set of rules and safety measures has emerged within
the BDSM community.
To ensure consensus related to BDSM activity, pre-play negotiations are
commonplace, especially among partners who do not know each other very
well. These negotiations concern the interests and fantasies of each
partner and establish a framework.[11]
This kind of discussion is a typical "unique selling proposition" of
BDSM sessions
[12] and quite
commonplace. Additionally, safewords are often arranged to provide for
an immediate stop of any activity if any participant should so desire[13].
Quick and reliable response to safewords is an imperative for safe BDSM.
In case of voice constraints of the bottom, eye contact or hand signs
might be the only means of communication and are therefore of very high
importance for safety.
Practical safety aspects are of tremendous importance. It is highly
important during bondage sessions to understand which parts of the human
body have a risk of damage to nerves and blood vessels by contusion or
have a high risk of scar development. Using crops, whips or floggers,
the top's fine motor skills and anatomical knowledge can make the
difference between a satisfying session for the bottom and a highly
unpleasant experience, possibly including severe physical harm[14].
The very broad range of different BDSM "toys" and physical and
psychological control techniques[15]
often requires a far-reaching knowledge of details related to the
requirements of the individual session, such as anatomy, physics, and
psychology.[16][17]
It is necessary to be able to identify a bottom's psychological
"freakouts" in advance in order to avoid it. Such losses of emotional
balance due to sensory or emotional overload are the most common SM
emergency.[18]
It is extremely important to follow his or her reactions empathetically
and continue or stop accordingly.[19][20]
Aspects The
acronym BDSM includes psychological and physiological facets:
Bondage & Discipline (B&D)
Domination & Submission (D&S)
Sadism & Masochism (or Sadomasochism) (S&M)
This model for differentiating among these three aspects of BDSM is
increasingly used in literature today. Nevertheless, it is only an
attempt at phenomonological differentiation. Individual tastes and
preferences in the area of sexuality may overlap among these areas,
which are discussed separately here.
Bondage/Discipline
Bondage and Discipline are two aspects of BDSM that do not necessarily
relate to one another, but can appear jointly.
Bondage
The term bondage describes the practice of restraining for pleasure.
Bondage is usually, but not always, a sexual practice.[21]
While bondage is a very popular variation within the larger field of
BDSM, it is nevertheless sometimes differentiated from the rest of this
field.[22]
Studies among BDSM practitioners in the U.S. have shown that about half
of all men find the idea of bondage to be erotic; many women do as well
(see Incidence).
Strictly speaking, bondage means binding the partner by tying their
appendages together; for example, by the use of handcuffs or by lashing
their arms to an object. Bondage can be also be achieved by spreading
the appendages and fastening them with chains to a St. Andrews cross or
spreader bars.[23]
Discipline
The term discipline describes the use of rules and punishment to control
overt behavior in BDSM[24].
Punishment can be pain caused physically (such as caning), humiliation
caused psychologically (such as a public flagellation) or loss of
freedom caused physically (eg. chaining the Bottom to the foot of a
bed). Another aspect is the structured training of the Bottom.[25]
Overlap with practices from the field of bondage can occur, but is not
necessarily mandatory. A differentiation between bondage and discipline
is sometimes difficult.
Domination and submission
Main article: Domination and submission (BDSM)
Domination and submission (also known as D&s, Ds or D/s) is a set of
behaviors, customs and rituals relating to the giving and accepting of
dominance of one individual over another in an erotic or lifestyle
context. It explores the more mental aspect of BDSM. This is also the
case in many relationships not considering themselves as
sadomasochistic; it is considered to be a part of BDSM if it is
practiced cognizantly. The range of its individual characteristics is
thereby wide.
Examples of mentally orientated practices are education games, during
which the dominant requires certain forms of behavior from the
submissive. Special forms include erotic roleplay like ageplay, in which
a difference in age, either real or enacted, formulates the background;
or petplay. Concerted deployed sexual rejection exercised on the partner
can be an aspect of Dominance and Submission as well (see cuckoldry).
The most established and probably most cliché set form of dominance and
submission is dominance and slavedom. These can be administrated for the
short duration of a session among otherwise-emancipated partners, but
also can be integrated into everyday life indefinitely. In a few
relationships, it leads as far as total submission of one partner in the
truest sense of the phrase total power exchange. Compensating elements
of the total domination and submission are care and devotion
complementing one another, thus facilitating stable relationships.
The consensual submission of the sub is sometimes demonstrated to others
by symbols indicating his/her belonging to the dom, such as wearing a
collar, special tattoos, piercings, very short haircut or a bald head.
Occasionally, actual "slave contracts" are set out in writing to record
the formal consent of the parties to the power exchange, stating their
common vision of the relationship dynamic. Such documents have not been
recognised as being legally binding. Contracts that are contra bonos
mores (contrary to public morals) are generally illegal, and such
contracts can even be constitutionally prohibited. In Europe, such
agreements may be contrary to Article 3 of the European Convention on
Human Rights which grants a general freedom from "unhuman or degrading
treatment". This right had been held to be absolute and no limitations
or derogations are permitted by the Convention. Nevertheless, the mere
existence of such purported contracts has resulted in banner headlines
in yellow press publications, and uninformed third parties seeing such
information out of context are periodically led to rejecting and
condemning the relationships they describe.
Sadomasochism
The term Sadomasochism is derived from the words sadism and masochism.
In the context of consensual sexual activities, sadism and masochism are
not strictly accurate terms; there is a significant difference from the
medical or psychological usage of both terms. Sadomasochism refers to
the physical aspects of BDSM. Sadism describes sexual pleasure derived
by inflicting pain, degradation, or humiliation on another person. On
the other hand, the masochist enjoys being bound, spanked or suffering
within the consensual scenario.
Sadomasochists do not enjoy causing or receiving pain in other
situations e.g. accidental injury, medical procedures.
Discipline often incorporates sadomasochistic aspects. In contrast to
Discipline, flagellation plays a less important role in sadomasochism,
and there are a wide variety of other practices used in order to inflict
pain. Sadomasochism is practiced in isolation relatively rarely; an
amalgam of various aspects of BDSM is more common.
Physical aspects
On a physical level, BDSM is partly connected to the intentional
infliction of physical pain, suffering and other intense sensations.
BDSM practitioners often compare the effects induced by the resulting
endorphines to the so-called "runner’s high" or to the afterglow of
orgasm[26].
The corresponding trance-like mental state is also known as "subspace"
and is regularly described as very comforting. Some use the term "body
stress" to describe this physiological sensation[27].
This experience of Algolagnia is important, but is not the only
motivation for many BDSM practitioners. The philosopher Edmund Burke
defines this sensation of pleasure derived from pain by the word
sublime.[28]
The regions of the brain that manage sexual stimuli and pain overlap,
resulting in some individuals associating pain with sexual pleasure as
the neurological reactions are intertwined. A minority of BDSM
practitioners take part in sessions for which they do not receive any
personal gratification. They enter such situations solely with the
intention to allow their partners to fulfill their own needs and/or
fetishes.
In some BDSM sessions, the Top exposes the Bottom to a wide range of
sensual impressions, for example: pinching, biting, scratching with
fingernails, spanking or the use of various objects such as crops,
whips, liquid wax, icecubes, Wartenberg wheels, erotic
electrostimulation or others[29].
Fixation by handcuffs, ropes, chains or vacuum beds may be used as well.
The repertoire of possible "toys" is limited only by the imagination of
both partners. To some extent, everyday items like clothes-pins, wooden
spoons or plastic wrap are used as pervertibles.[30]
It is commonly considered that a pleasurable BDSM experience during a
session is very strongly dependent upon the Top's competence and
experience and the Bottom's physical and mental state at the time of the
session. Trust and sexual arousal help the partners enter a shared
mindset.[31][32]
Some BDSM practitioners compare related sensations with musical
compositions and representation, in which single sensual impressions are
the musical notes of the situation. From this point of view, different
sensuous impressions are combined to create a total experience leaving a
lasting impression.
Relationship models
Play relations
Many BDSM practitioners regard the practice of BDSM in their sex life as
sexual roleplaying and therefore speak of play and playing. The
execution of such play is termed a "session", and the contents and the
circumstances of the play are often referred to as a scene. The term
play relations is used as well, describing two different aspects:
On the one hand, the expression is used in usual emancipated
relationships, in which BDSM is part of, or foreplay to, sexual
activities. If several relationships with intense emotional connections
exist over a longer time, then there can exist an overlap with the
practice of polyamory.
On the other hand, the term "play relations" can describe relationships
which are based exclusively on the occasional conjoint realization of
sexual fantasies as a common goal and in which no further relationship
exists.
Common role models
Tops and Bottoms
Such or comparable models are often used by Bottoms as a symbol of their
willingness to submit. In BDSM terminology the partner who has the
active, i.e. controlling role in a session or in the entire relationship
is described as Top, a role that often involves inflicting pain,
degradation or subjection. The partner referred to as Bottom or more
frequently as Sub, exposes him- or herself voluntarily to those actions
during the session and/or is the passive partner in the connection.
Although the Top habitually is the dominant and the Bottom the
submissive partner, it is not inevitably. In some cases the Top follows
instructions, i.e. he "tops" the Bottom according to the Bottom's
desires and in a way the Bottom expressly requires. A Top only having
apparent control, while he in reality is conforming the instructions
given by the Bottom, is labeled Service Top. Contrasting with the
Service Top is the Dominant Top, controlling his submissive partner by
using physical or psychological techniques during the session or in
lifestyle. If desired the Top can even instruct the submissive partner
to exercise temporary control.
A similar distinction also may apply to Bottoms. At one end of the
spectrum are those who are indifferent to, or even reject physical
stimulations. At the other end of the range are Bottoms who enjoy
physical and psychological stimulations but are not willing to be
subordinate to the person who applies these. The Bottom is frequently
the partner who specifies the basic conditions of the session and gives
instructions, directly or indirectly, in the prelude to the session,
while the Top often respects this guidance. Other Bottoms try to control
their Top by provoking reactions or "misbehaving" to attract interest.
Nevertheless a small, very puristic "school" exists within the BDSM
community, which regards such Topping from the Bottom as incompatible
with the standards of BDSM relations.
Switch
Some BDSM practitioners switch, meaning they play either or both roles,
Top or Bottom, depending on the actual session's setting. They may
practice this within one specific session or take these different roles
in different sessions with the same or different partners. There are
many reasons for this. Sometimes a Switch lives in a relationship with a
partner of the same primary preference (for example, two Tops), so
switching represents the only possibility of being able to fulfill all
of his or her BDSM needs within the relationship. Some people change
roles without regarding themselves as Switches, since they do it only
very irregularly or only under certain circumstances.
Non-erotic
Contrasting such play relationships are relationships in which everyday
life is clearly framed by the concept of BDSM even outside of sexual
activities.[33]
The partners involved maintain in their daily life an appropriate
balance of power and accordingly make aspects of BDSM a consistent part
of their lifestyle. Here, BDSM cannot be designated a merely sexual
phenomenon. The term 24/7 relationship is derived from 24 hours a day, 7
days a week.
Another term for such behavior is D/s, derived from
"Dominant/submissive". The dominant partner controls most aspects of the
submissive's life. Particular areas of life such as work, family, or
friends can be excluded from the D/s relationship and not be placed
under control of the dominant partner. Some D/s relationships, however,
cover all areas of life; such constellations are designated as Total
Power Exchange (TPE). In D/s, and especially in TPE relationships,
changes in the balance of power (so-called Switching) do not take place.
TPE relationships probably represent the least common role behavior
within the BDSM spectrum
Professional services
A professional dominatrix, often referred to within the culture as a
"pro-domme", offers services encompassing the range of bondage,
discipline, and domination in exchange for money. Many dominatrices do
not see themselves as prostitutes, since sexual intercourse between
dominatrix and client usually is out of the question. However, in some
cases, the sexual gratification or climax of the client may be permitted
by other means. The term "dominatrix" is little-used within the
non-professional BDSM scene. A non-professional dominant woman is more
commonly referred to as a Domme or Femdom. Dommes may title themselves
as Lady, Mistress, or Madame, and require their submissives to address
them in this fashion, to emphasize the shift of power.
Far more seldom seen are the services of professional female slaves. A
professional slave brooks her costumer's dominant behavior within
negotiated limits. Sexual intercourse is often part of the arrangement.
Scene: subculture and
public
Today, the BDSM culture exists in most western countries[34].
This offers BDSM practitioners the opportunity to discuss BDSM relevant
topics and problems with like-minded people. This culture is often
viewed as a subcultures, mainly because BDSM is often still regarded as
"ill", "bizarre" or "perverse" by a large segment of the public and the
media. Many people hide their leaning from society since they are afraid
of the incomprehension and of social exclusion. It is commonly known in
the BDSM culture that there are practitioners living on all continents,
but there is no documented evidence for many countries (due to
restrictive laws and censorship motivated by politics or religion)
except their presence in online BDSM communities and dating sites.[35]
This scene appears particularly on the Internet, in publications, and in
meetings such as SM parties, gatherings called munches, and erotic
fairs. The annual Folsom Street Fair is the world's largest BDSM event.[36]
It has its roots in the gay leather movement. There are also conventions
like Living in Leather, TESfest and Black Rose.
North American cities that have large BDSM communities include New York
City, Seattle, Los Angeles, Chicago, Houston, Philadelphia, San
Francisco, San Diego, Dallas, Minneapolis, Toronto, Winnipeg, and
Vancouver. European cities with large BDSM communities include London,
Paris, Berlin, Amsterdam, Munich, Cologne, Hamburg and Rome.
Like many subcultures, BDSM practitioners have their own jargon. (see
the BDSM Glossary)
Symbols
BDSM- and fetish movements have spread widely in western societies'
everyday life by different factors as avant-garde fashion, Rap, Hip-Hop,
Heavy Metal, goth subculture[37]
and Science Fiction-tv series, and are often not consciously connected
with their BDSM roots by many people. The use of Piercings is not scene
typical anymore. While it was mainly bound to the Punk- and
BDSM-subcultures in the 1990's, it has spread into wide parts of the
western populations today.
The Leather Pride flag is a symbol for the Leather subculture and also
widely used within BDSM. In continental Europe the Ring of O is wide
spread among BDSM-Practitioners. The Triskelion, while quite common in
the Anglo-Saxon communities, is less common in Europe. It has
significantly higher degree of "signal impact" than the ring which is
also common in Goth subculture and widely sold as bling jewelry.
Prejudices
Understanding of BDSM culture and practices remains intertwined with
prejudices, clichés and stereotypes. Misunderstandings may arise from
general lack of knowledge concerning sexuality and sexual practices as
well as misconceptions on how one's personal life and public persona can
vary greatly. For example, it is sometimes assumed that a submissive
would prefer to experience pain and degradation in their everyday life,
or conversely, that they would prefer to have exactly the opposite.
There is no clear correlation between the position in everyday life and
BDSM preferences. A further misunderstanding is that members of BDSM
communities want only to be hurt or to inflict physical, psychological
and mental pain, which diminishes and disparages the emotional and
spiritual relationships that develop.[38][39]
Another misconception is the idea of women generally being the dominant
part in BDSM relationships. Quite often the picture of BDSM is reduced
to the idea of crude corporal punishment, neglecting the broad spectrum
of behaviors within the culture. Along with the whip-swinging
dominatrix, the sadomasochist in full leather regalia is another common
cliché.
While overlaps between different kinds of fetishism can exist, there is
no inevitable connection between BDSM and fetishisms (eg: Latex, pvc or
leather). The frequent occurrence of such clothing can be partly
explained by its function as a quasi-formalized dress code. The relative
openness towards alternative lifestyles results in fetishisms being more
substantially lived within the culture of BDSM than in other cultures.
Since the term BDSM covers several different aspects and these occur
with varying emphasis, the arising spectrum of individual interests and
personalities is large and extremely diverse. Due to the lack of
information in the total population and the reluctance with many to come
out about matters of an extremely personal nature leads to situations in
which actions and statements of individual BDSM practitioners are
accredited to the community at large just as the larger LGBT community
has been characterized by drag queens and other minority communities
similarly mischaracterized.
At least in the western, industrialized countries and Japan, since the
1980s sadomasochists have begun to form information exchange and support
groups to counter the discriminatory image held by orthodox science and
parts of the public. This has happened independently in the United
States and in several European countries. With the advent of the web,
international cooperation has started to develop — for example
Datenschlag is a joint effort of sadomasochists in the three major
German-speaking countries, and the mailing list Schlagworte uses the
model of a news agency to connect six countries. Some credit highly
publicized events like Operation Spanner and the Internation leather
contests with fostering international cooperation and collaboration.
Coming out
Some people who feel attracted by the situations usually compiled under
the term BDSM reach a point where they decide to come out of the closet.
While LGBT people increasingly are coming out publicly, sadomasochists
keep still themselves comparatively closeted. Even so, depending upon a
survey`s participants, about 5 to 25 percent of the US-American
population show affinity to the subject.[40][41]
Other than a few artists, practically no celebrities are publicly known
as sadomasochists.
Public knowledge of one's BDSM lifestyle can have devastating vocational
and social effects (Persona non grata) for sadomasochists[42].
The reason for this is seen by some authors as a mixture of lack of
public educational advertising, lurid media coverage and substantial
criticism from some feminists, whose call for more rigid laws in
Switzerland has threatened the legal status of sadomasochism. Within
feminist circles there are two basic positions within the discussion: a
sadophobe faction on the one side (see Alice Schwarzer) and a
sex-positive on the other (see Samois); both of them can be traced back
to the 1970s.[43]
Opponents of BDSM contend that it can lead to domestic violence.[44]
There is no scientific evidence for this theory. Many feminists have
criticized BDSM for eroticizing power and violence, and for reinforcing
misogyny. They argue that women who choose to engage in BDSM are making
a choice that is ultimately bad for women[45].
Sex-positive feminists argue that consensual BDSM activities are enjoyed
by some women and validate the sexual inclinations of these women. They
argue that feminists should not attack other women's sexual desires as
being "anti-feminist", and that there is no connection between
consensual kinky activities and sex crimes. While some radical feminists
suggest connections between consensual BDSM scenes and non-consensual
rape and sexual assault, sex-positive feminists find this insulting to
women.[46][47]
It is often mentioned that in BDSM, roles are not fixed to gender, but
personal preferences. Several studies on the correlation of BDSM
pornography and the violence against women recapitulate that there is no
correlation. Japan is a useful example: a country which has the lowest
rate of sexual crimes of all industrialized nations while being well
known for its comprehensive BDSM- and Bondage pornography (see
Pornography in Japan).[48]
In 1991 a lateral survey came to the conclusion that between 1964 and
1984, despite the increase in amount and availability of sadomasochistic
pornography in the US, Germany, Denmark and Sweden there is no
correlation with the national number of rapes to be found.[49]
Operation Spanner in the UK proves that BDSM practitioners still run the
risk of being stigmatized as criminals. In 2003, the media coverage of
Jack McGeorge showed that simply participating and working in BDSM
support groups poses risks to one's job, even in countries where no law
restricts it.[50]
Here a clear difference can be seen to the situation of homosexuals. The
psychological strain appearing in some individual cases is normally
neither articulated nor acknowledged in public. Nevertheless it leads to
a difficult psychological situation in which the person concerned can be
exposed to high levels of emotional stress.[51]
In the stages of "self awareness" , he or she realizes their desires
related to BDSM scenarios and/or decides to be open for such. Some
authors call this internal coming-out. Two separate surveys on this
topic independently came to the conclusion that 58 percent[52]
and 67 percent of the sample, respectively[53]
had realized their disposition before their 19th birthday. Other surveys
on this topic show comparable results.
Independent of age, coming-out can potentially result in a difficult
life crisis, sometimes leading to thoughts or acts of suicide. While
homosexuals have created support networks in the last decades,
sadomasochistic support networks are just starting to develop in most
countries. In German speaking countries they are only moderately more
developed.[54]
The internet is the prime contact point for support groups today,
allowing for local and international networking. In the US Kink Aware
Professionals (KAP) a privately funded, non-profit service provides the
community with referrals to psychotherapeutic, medical, and legal
professionals who are knowledgeable about and sensitive to the BDSM,
fetish, and leather community.[55]
In the USA and the UK, the National Coalition for Sexual Freedom(NCSF)
and Sexual Freedom Coalition (SFC) have emerged to represent the
interests of sadomasochists. The German Bundesvereinigung
Sadomasochismus e.V. is committed to the same aim of providing
information and driving press relations. In 1996 the website and mailing
list Datenschlag went online in German and English providing the largest
bibliography, as well as one of the most extensive historical
collections of sources related to BDSM.
Parties and Clubs
BDSM parties are events on which BDSM practitioners and other similarly
interested people meet in order to communicate, share experiences and
knowledge, and to "play" in an erotic atmosphere. The parties show
similarities with ones in the Dark Culture, being based on a more or
less strictly enforced dress code; most often frivolous clothing made of
latex, leather or lacquer (vinyl, PVC), latex, lycra etc., emphasizing
the body's shape and the primary and secondary sexual characteristic.
The requirement for such dress codes differ. While some events have
none, others have a policy in order create a more coherent atmosphere
and to prevent voyeurs from taking part.[56]
At these parties, BDSM can be publicly performed on a stage, or more
privately in separees or dungeons.[57]
Sexual intercourse stands is usually not the center of the activities. A
reason for the relatively fast spread of this kind of event is the
opportunity to use a wide range of "playing equipment", which in most
apartments or houses is unavailable. Slings, St. Andrews crosses,
spanking benches, and punishing supports or cages are often made
available. The problem of noise disturbance is also lessened at these
events, while in the home setting many BDSM activities can be limited by
this factor. In addition, such parties offer both exhibitionists and
voyeurs a forum to indulge their inclinations without social
approbation. In order to ensure the maximum safety and comfort for the
participants certain standards of behavior have evolved, these include
aspects of courtesy, privacy, respect and safewords among others.[58]
Today, BDSM parties are taking place in most of the larger cities in the
western world.
In some cities there are specialized BDSM clubs with a more or less
structured program schedule, in which theme parties alternate with
topic-free "play evenings", similar to the business concepts of more
conventional nightclubs.
Social control of these parties and/or in the clubs is far higher than
in a normal discotheque. Consensuality in the public BDSM sessions is
strictly enforced.
Apart from commercial events there are also privately organized or only
moderately profit-oriented parties, which are organized by BDSM groups
and individuals. Minors are not allowed at parties or clubs.
Psychology
Incidence
BDSM is practiced in all social strata and is common in both
heterosexual and homosexual men and women[59]
in varied occurrences and intensities.[60]
The spectrum ranges from couples with no connections to the subculture
in their homes, without any awareness of the concept of BDSM, playing
"tie-me-up-games", to public scenes on St. Andrew's crosses at large
events, for example the Folsom-Fairs in several American and European
cities.
The percentage of women is significant higher than that of most behavior
patterns formally considered to be paraphilias. Estimation on the
overall percentage of BDSM related sexual behavior in the general
population range from 5 to 25 percent, depending on the scientific
objectives.
A non-representative survey on the sexual behavior of American students
published in 1997 and based on questionnaires had a response rate of
about 8,9%. It results showed 15% of openly homosexual males, 21% of
openly lesbian and female bisexual students, 11% of the male and 9% of
the female heterosexual students committed to BDSM related fantasies.[41]
In all groups the level of practical BDSM experiences varied about 6%.
Within the group of openly female bisexuals and lesbians the quote was
significantly higher, at 21%. Independent of their sexual orientation,
about 12% of all questioned students, 16% of the outed female homo- and
bisexuals and 8% of the male heterosexuals articulated an interest in
spanking. Experience with this sexual behavior was indicated by 30% of
male heterosexuals, 33% of female bisexuals and lesbians, and 24% of the
male homo- and bisexual men and female heterosexual women.[41]
Even if this study were not considered representative, other surveys
indicate similar dimensions in a differing target groups.[61][62][63]
In a representative study published in 1999 by the German Institut für
rationale Psychologie, about two thirds of the interviewed women stated
a desire to be at the mercy of their sexual partners from time to time.
69% admitted to fantasies dealing with sexual submissiveness, 42% stated
interest in explicit BDSM techniques, 25% in Bondage.[64]
A 1976 study in the general U.S. population suggests three percent have
had positive experiences with Bondage or master-slave role playing.
Overall 12% of the interviewed females and 18% of the males were willing
to try it.[65][66]
A 1990 Kinsey Institute report stated that 5% to 10% of Americans
occasionally engage in sexual activities related to BDSM. 11% of men and
17% of women reported trying bondage.[67][68]
Some elements of BDSM have been popularized through increased media
coverage since the middle 1990s. Thus both black leather clothing,
sexual jewelery such as chains and dominance role play appear
increasingly outside of BDSM contexts.
According to a 2005 survey of 317.000 people in 41 countries, about 20%
of the surveyed people have at least once used masks, blindfolds or
other bondage utilities, and 5% explicitly connected themselves with
sadomasochism.[69]
In 2004, 19% mentioned spanking as one of their practices and 22%
confirmed the use of blindfolds and/or handcuffs.[70]
Some BDSM-accessories, like the Ring of O, have been integrated into the
jewelry collections of internationally well known designers like Calvin
Klein.
Psychological categorization
In the past many activities and fantasies related to BDSM were generally
attributed to sadism or masochism and were regarded by psychiatrists as
pathologic.
Following the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-10)
sadomasochism is categorized a "Disorder of sexual preference" (F65.5)
and described as follows: "A preference for sexual activity which
involves the infliction of pain or humiliation, or bondage. If the
subject prefers to be the recipient of such stimulation this is called
masochism; if the provider, sadism. Often an individual obtains sexual
excitement from both sadistic and masochistic activities."[71]
With the publication of the Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental
Disorders (DSM-IV) in 1994 new criteria of diagnosis were available
describing BDSM clearly not as disorders of sexual preferences. They are
now not regarded as illnesses in and of themselves. The DSM-IV asserts
that "The fantasies, sexual urges, or behaviors" must "cause clinically
significant distress or impairment in social, occupational, or other
important areas of functioning" in order for sexual sadism or masochism
to be considered a disorder. The manualls' latest edition (DSM-IV-TR)
requires that the activity must be the sole means of sexual
gratification for a period of six (6) months, and either cause
"clinically significant distress or impairment in social, occupational,
or other important areas of functioning" or involve a violation of
consent to be diagnosed as a paraphilia.[72]
Overlays of sexual preference disorders and the practice of BDSM
practices can occur, however.
In Europe, an organization called ReviseF65 has worked towards this
purpose in the International Classification of Diseases (ICD-10).[73]
In 1995 as the first European Union country Denmark has completely
removed sadomasochism from the it’s national classification of diseases.[74]
Recent surveys on the spread of BDSM fantasies and -practices show
strong variations in the range of their results. Nevertheless it can be
stated that the vast majority of the researchers assume 5 to 25 percent
of the population showing sexual behavior related to joyfully
experienced pain or dominance and submission. The population with
related fantasies is considered even higher.[75]
There are only a few studies researching the psychological aspects of
BDSM using modern scientific standards. A pivotal survey on the subject
was published by US-American psychotherapist Charles Moser in 1988 in
the Journal of Social Work and Human Sexuality.[51]
His conclusion was that while there is a general lack of data on the
psychological problems of BDSM practitioners, some fundamental results
are obvious. He emphasizes that there is no evidence for the theory that
BDSM has common symptoms or any common psychopathology; Clinical
literature, though does not give a consistent picture of BDSM
practitioners. Moser emphasizes that there is no evidence at all
supporting the theory of BDSM practitioners having any special
psychiatric problems or even problems based solely on their preferences.
Problems do sometimes occur in the area of self classification by the
person concerned. During the phase of the coming-out, self questioning
related to one's own "normality" is quite common. According to Moser,
the discovery of BDSM preferences can result in fear of the current
non-BDSM relationship's destruction. This, combined with the fear of
discrimination in everyday life, leads in some cases to a double life
which can be highly burdensome.
At the same time, the denial of BDSM preferences can induce stress and
dissatisfaction with one's own "vanilla"-lifestyle, feeding the
apprehension of finding no partner. Moser states that BDSM practitioners
having problems finding BDSM partners would probably have problems in
finding an non-BDSM partner as well.
The wish to remove BDSM preferences is another possible reason for
psychological problems since it is not possible in most cases. Finally,
the scientist states that BDSM practitioners seldom commit violent
crimes. From his point of view, crimes of BDSM practitioners usually
have no connection with the BDSM components existing in their life.
Moser's study comes to the conclusion that there is no scientific
evidence, which could give reason to refuse members of this group work-
or safety certificates, adoption possibilities, custody or other social
rights or privileges.
The Swiss psychoanalyst Fritz Morgenthaler shares a similar perspective
in his book, "Homosexuality, Heterosexuality, Perversion" (1988). He
states that possible problems result not necessarily from the
non-normative behavior, but in most cases primarily from the real or
feared reactions of the social environment towards the own preferences.[76]
In 1940 psychoanalyst Theodor Reik reached implicitly the same
conclusion in his standard work "Aus Leiden Freuden. Masochismus und
Gesellschaft".[77]
History
Origins
The historical origins of BDSM are obscure. During the 9th century b.c.
ritual flagellations were performed in Artemis Orthia, one of the most
important religious areas of ancient Sparta, where the Cult of Orhtia, a
preolympic religion, was practiced. Here ritual flagellation called
diamastigosis took place on a regular basis.
One of the oldest graphical proofs of sadomasochistic activities is
found in an Etruscan burial site in Tarquinia. Inside the Tomba della
Fustigazione (Flogging grave), in the latter 6th century b.c., two men
are portrayed flagellating a woman with a cane and a hand during an
erotic situation. Another reference related to flagellation is to be
found in the 6th book of the Satires of the ancient Roman Poet Juvenal
(1st - 2nd century ad), further reference can be found in The Satyricon
of Petronius, where a delinquent is whipped for sexual arousal.
Anecdotal narratives related to humans who have had themselves voluntary
bound, flagellated or whipped as a substitute for sex or as part of
foreplay reach back to the 3rd and 4th century.
Even the Kama Sutra describes four different kinds of hitting during
lovemaking, the allowed regions of the human body to target and
different kinds of joyful "cries of pain" practiced by bottoms. The
collection of historic texts related to sensuous experiences explicitly
emphasizes that impact play, biting and pinching during sexual
activities should only be performed consensually since some women do not
consider such behavior to be joyful. From this perspective the Kama
Sutra can be considered as one of the first written resources dealing
with sadomasochistic activities and safety rules. Further texts with
sadomasochistic connotation appear worldwide during the following
centuries on a regular basis.
There are anecdotal reports of people willingly being bound or whipped,
as a prelude to or substitute for sex, during the fourteenth century.
The medieval phenomenon of courtly love in all of its slavish devotion
and ambivalence has been suggested by some writers to be a precursor of
BDSM.[78] Some
sources claim that BDSM as a distinct form of sexual behavior originated
at the beginning of the eighteenth century when Western civilization
began medically and legally categorizing sexual behavior (see Etymology
in the Glossary). There are reports of brothels specializing in
flagellation as early as 1769, and John Cleland's novel Fanny Hill,
published in 1749, mentions a flagellation scene. Other sources give a
broader definition, citing BDSM-like behavior in earlier times and other
cultures, such as the medieval flagellates and the physical ordeal
rituals of some Native American societies.
Although the names of the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch
are attached to the terms sadism and masochism respectively, Sade's way
of life is not meeting with modern BDSM standards of informed consent.
BDSM ideas and imagery have existed on the fringes of Western culture
throughout the twentieth century. Robert Bienvenu attributes the origins
of modern BDSM to three sources, which he names as "European Fetish"
(from 1928), "American Fetish" (from 1934), and "Gay Leather" (from
1950). Another source are the sexual games played in brothels, which go
back into the nineteenth century if not earlier. Irving Klaw, during the
1950s and 1960s, produced some of the first commercial film and
photography with a BDSM theme (most notably with Bettie Page) and
published comics by the now-iconic bondage artists John Willie and Eric
Stanton.
Stanton's model Bettie Page became at the same time one of the first
successful models in the area of fetish photography and one of the most
famous pin-up girls of American mainstream culture. Italian author and
designer Guido Crepax was deeply influenced by him, coining the style
and development of European adult comics in the second half of the 20th
century. The artists Helmut Newton and Robert Mapplethorpe are the most
prominent examples of the increasing use of BDSM-related motives in
modern photography and the public discussions still resulting from this.
Leather movement
Much of the BDSM ethos can be traced back to the gay male leather
culture, which formalized itself out of the group of men who were
soldiers returning home after World War II (1939-1945).[79]
This subculture is epitomized by the Leatherman's Handbook by Larry
Townsend, published in 1972, which essentially defined what was later
called the "Old Guard leather" culture.[80][81]
This code emphasized strict formality and fixed roles (i.e. no
switching), and did not include lesbian women or heterosexuals. In 1981,
however, the publication of Coming to Power by lesbian-feminist group
Samois led to a greater knowledge and acceptance of BDSM in the lesbian
community.[82]
They got into conflict with fundamentalist part of the feminist movement
which considers BDSM to be the base of misogyny and violent porn.
Today the Leather Movement is often seen as a part of the BDSM-culture
instead as a development deriving from gay subculture, even if a huge
part of the BDSM-subculture was gay in the past.
In the 1990s the so called New Guard leather subculture evolved as a
reaction to the Old Guard's restrictions. This new orientation embraced
switching and started to integrate psychological aspects into their play
and to diminish the old rigid distinction of roles and the exclusion of
heterosexuals and women which was widely considered a basic principle of
the Old Guard.
Internet
In the mid-nineties, the Internet provided a way of finding people with
specialized interests around the world as well as on a local level, and
communicating with them anonymously.[83]
This brought about an explosion of interest and knowledge of BDSM,
particularly on the usenet group alt.sex.bondage. When that group became
too cluttered with spam, the focus moved to soc.subculture.bondage-bdsm.
In addition to traditional "brick and mortar" sex shops, which sell sex
paraphernalia, there has also been an explosive growth of online adult
toy companies that specialize in leather/latex gear and BDSM toys. The
first known online store specializing in bondage gear was JT's
Stockroom, which became a primarily online business as early as 1990.
Soon an increasing number of shops focused on the new emerging "target
group". Once a very niche market, there are now very few sex toy
companies that do not offer some sort of BDSM or fetish gear in their
catalog. Kinky elements seem to have worked their way into even the most
"vanilla" markets. The former niche expanded to an important pillar of
the business with adult accessories. Today practically all suppliers of
sex toys do offer items which originally found usage in the BDSM
subculture. Padded handcuffs, latex- and leather garments, as well as
more exotic items like soft whips for fondling and TENS for erotic
electro stimulation can be found in catalog aiming on classical vanilla
target groups, indicating that former boundaries increasingly seem to
shift.
During the last years the Internet also provides a central platform for
networking among individuals who are interested in the subject. Besides
countless private and commercial choices there is an increasing number
of local networks and support groups emerging. These groups often offer
comprehensive background and health related information for people who
have been unwillingly outed as well as contact lists with information on
psychologists, physicians and lawyers who are familiar with BDSM related
topics
Etymology
The development of the term BDSM is complex. Originally "Sadism" and
"Masochism" were purely technical terms for psychological features,
which were classified as psychological illness. The terms are derived
from the names of the Marquis de Sade and Leopold von Sacher-Masoch,
based on the content of the authors' works.
In 1843 the Hungarian physician Heinrich Kaan published Psychopathia
sexualis ("Psychopathy of Sex"), a writing in which he converts the sin
conceptions of Christianity into medical diagnoses. With his work the
originally theological terms "perversion", "aberration" and "deviation"
became part of the scientific terminology for the first time.
The German psychiatrist Richard von Krafft Ebing introduced the terms
"Sadism" and "Masochism" into the medical terminology in his work Neue
Forschungen auf dem Gebiet der Psychopathia sexualis ("New research in
the area of Psychopathy of Sex") in 1890.[84]
In 1905 Sigmund Freud described "Sadism" and "Masochism" in his Drei
Abhandlungen zur Sexualtheorie ("Three papers on Sexualtheory") as
diseases developing from an incorrect development of the child psyche
and laid the groundwork for the scientific perspective on the subject in
the following decades. This lead to the first time use of the compound
term Sado-Masochism (German "Sado-Masochismus")) by the Viennese
Psychoanalytic Isidor Isaak Sadger in its work Über den
sado-masochistischen Komplex ("Regarding the sadomasochistic complex")
in 1913.[85]
In the past BDSM activists turned repeatedly against these conceptual
models, originally deriving from singular historical figures and
implying a clear pathological connotation. They argued that there is no
common sense in attributing a phenomenon as complex as BDSM to two
individual humans, as well one might speak of "Leonardism" instead of
Homosexuality. The BDSM scene tried to distinguish themselves with the
expression "B&D" for bondage and discipline from the sometimes
pejorative connotations of the term "S&M".
The abbreviation BDSM was probably coined in the early 1990s in the
subculture around the Newsgroup news:alt.sex.bondage. The new term is
there for the first time provable in July 1991.
Later the dominance and submission dimension was integrated into the
connotation of BDSM, creating the multilevel acronym common today.
Legal status
It is entirely dependent on the legal situation in individual countries
whether the practice of BDSM has any criminal relevance or legal
consequences. Criminalization of consensually implemented BDSM practices
is usually not with explicit reference to BDSM, but results from the
fact that such behavior as spanking or cuffing someone could be
considered a breach of personal rights, which in principle constitutes a
criminal offense.
In Germany, The Netherlands, Japan and Scandinavia, such behavior is
legal in principle. In Austria the legal status is not clear, while in
Switzerland some BDSM practices can be considered criminal. Spectacular
incidents like the US-American scandal of People v. Jovanovic and the
British Operation Spanner demonstrate the degree to which difficult grey
areas can pose a problem for the individuals and authorities involved.
Germany
False imprisonment can be charged if the victim--when applying an
objective view--can be considered to be impaired in his or her rights of
free movement. Following cases in which sado-masochistic practices had
been repeatedly used as pressure tactics against former partners in
custody cases, the Appeals Court of Hamm ruled in February of 2006 that
sexual inclinations toward sado-masochism are no indication of a lack of
capabilities for successful child raising.[86]
Great Britain
British law does not recognize the possibility of consenting to bodily
injury. Such acts are illegal, even between consenting adults, and these
laws are enforced. This leads to the somewhat absurd situation that,
while Great Britain and especially London are world centers of the
closely-related fetish scene, there are only very private events for the
BDSM scene which are in no way comparable to the German "play party"
scene. This situation is satirized by the film Preaching to the
Perverted.
Following Operation Spanner the European Court of Human Rights ruled in
January of 1999 in Laskey, Jaggard and Brown v. United Kingdom that no
violation of Article 8 occurred because the amount of physical or
psychological harm that the law allows between any two people, even
consenting adults, is to be determined by the State the individuals live
in, as it is the State's responsibility to balance the concerns of
public health and well-being with the amount of control a State should
be allowed to exercise over its citizens. In the Criminal Justice and
Immigration Bill 2007, the British Government cited the Spanner case as
justification for criminalizing images of consensual acts, as part of
its proposed criminalization of possession of "extreme pornography".[87]
Italy
For Italian law, BDSM is right on the border between crime and legality,
and everything lies in the interpretation of the Code by the judge. The
concept is that anyone willingly causing "injury" to another person is
to be punished. In this context, though, "injury" is legally defined as
"anything causing a condition of illness", and "illness" is ill-defined
itself in two different legal ways. The first is "any anatomical or
functional alteration of the organism" (thus technically including
little scratches and bruises too); The second is "a significant
worsening of a previous condition relevant to organic and relational
processes, requiring any kind of therapy". This makes somewhat risky to
play with someone, as later the "victim" might call for foul play using
any sort of little mark as evidence against the partner. Also, any
injury requiring over 20 days of medical care must be denounced by the
professional medic who discovers it, leading to automatic indictment of
the person who caused it. BDSM play between non-consenting adults,
minors or in public is of course punished according to "normal" laws.[88]
Austria
§90 of the criminal code declares bodily injury (§§ 83, 84) or the
endangerment of physical security (§89) to not be subject to penalty in
cases in which the "victim" has consented and the injury or endangerment
does not offend moral sensibilities. Case law from the Austrian Supreme
Court has consistently shown that bodily injury is only offensive to
moral sensibilities (and thus punishable) when a "serious injury"
(meaning a damage to health or an employment disability lasting more
than 24 days) or the "death" of the "victim" results.
Switzerland
The age of consent in Switzerland is 16 years, which also applies for
BDSM play. Children (i.e. those under 16) are not subject to punishment
for BDSM play as long as the age difference between them is less than
three years. Certain practices, however, require granting consent to
light injuries and thus are only allowed for those over 18. Since
Articles 135 and 197 of the Swiss Criminal Code were tightened, on 1
April 2002, ownership of "objects or demonstrations which depict sexual
acts with violent content" is punishable. This law amounts to a general
criminalization of sado-masochists, since nearly every sado-masochist
will have some kind of media which fulfill these criteria. Critics also
object to the wording of the law, which puts sado-masochists in the same
category as pedophiles and pederasts.[89][90]
Culture and media
Newspapers and
magazines
During the last years events and figures related to BDSM were repeatedly
spotlighted in the media.
In 2002, the Washington Post ran an article revealing that McGeorge, a
munitions analyst for the UNMOVIC, was also a leader in the Washington,
DC BDSM community. Following this, several commentators compared his
BDSM activities repeatedly with the torture techniques used by Saddam
Hussein, others compared todays discrimination of BDSM practitioners
with the situation of homosexuals in the past.
Following the discovery of Armin Meiwes (also known as the "Rotenburg
Cannibal" or "Metzgermeister" (The Master Butcher), European yellow
press described his case giving hints on "sado-maso-games" between the
delinquent and his victim.
In Germany EMMA, a well known feminist magazine published by Alice
Schwarzer, continued its PorNO campaign against hatred towards women and
violent pornography aiming to ban pornography in Germany. In it
Schwarzer states among other things that sadomasochistic practices are
generally to be equated with violence against women. Her judgment on
female sadomasochism ("Female masochism is collaboration!"[91])
has often been criticized for implying a state of war between genders.
The same magazine tried to bash Helmut Newton, accusing him of
"pornografization of fashion photography", and criticized his "therein
unrestrainedly realized sadomasochistic obsessions".[92]
During the last years BDSM support group and publications repeatedly
criticized a biased media coverage of BDSM.[93]
Literature
Sadomasochism is a perennial in the field of literature and has inspired
several classics like The story of O by Anne Declos (under the pseudonym
Pauline Réage), Justine by Marquis de Sade, Venus in Furs by Leopold von
Sacher-Masoch or the comics created by Eric Stanton. A literary
curiosity is Martha's letter to Leopold Bloom in Ulysses by James Joyce.
The novel Nine and a Half Weeks: A Memoir of a Love Affair published in
1978 by Elizabeth McNeill was the basis of the Hollywood movie 9½ Weeks.
Well-known author Anne Rice published under the pseudonym A. N.
Roquelaure three installments of her Sleeping Beauty Trilogy (The
Claiming of Sleeping Beauty, 1983), Beauty's Punishment (1984) and
Beauty's Release (1985) with explicit BDSM themes. The development shows
that today BDSM has reached the middle ground of international
literature on a scale which would have been unbelievable just a short
time ago.
A nine-volume book series published in July 2006 under the title
Bild-Erotik-Bibliothek by Bild-Zeitung, Germany's leading Tabloid and
the best-selling newspaper in Europe, in cooperation with Random House
gives a clear indication of the commercial potential of the topic. Out
of nine installments, three books had a well-defined emphasis on
sadomasochism, specifically BDSM. Besides Exit to Eden, also written by
Anne Rice under the pseudonym Anne Rampling, it also further featured
the sadomasochist classic Story of O. and the explicit novel Topping
from Below by Laura Reese.
While it can not be denied that the authors of SM-literature, Sade and
Sacher-Masoch, showed a propensity to the sexuality they described, it
has to be differentiated between the real sexual activity and the
fantasies described in literature. It would be an absurd demand of the
literature's authenticity that the author have to practice what he is
describing. Diary notes, interviews and the description of experience
remain a fictionalization of the described events. While sadomasochistic
rituals enacted as theatrical staging might show fetish characteristics,
the fetish is not literature. BDSM literature also does not embrace a
specific philosophy or morality, instead it represents it, as any other
kind of literature aspects of the particular Zeitgeist of its era.[94]
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Bondage
(BDSM)
In the context of BDSM, bondage involves people being tied up or
otherwise restrained for pleasure. Bondage is usually, but not always, a
sexual practice. The paraphilia of being sexually aroused by bondage is
sometimes known as vincilagnia.
BDSM subcultures
It is worth noting that bondage has sexual appeal to persons of both
sexes and all sexual orientations. However, a subculture of gay men,
sometimes called leathermen, were arguably among the first group to make
obvious hints of their tastes in bondage in public.
The growth of the gay leather subculture parallels the biker culture
that arose after World War II -- a number of early leathermen were WWII
veterans, and the military traditions of discipline and structure were
an important influence in Old Guard leather. While the bikers were not
identified as homosexual, the leathermen admired their toughness,
tenacity, and willingness to ignore mainstream social mores.
Consequently, they adopted the biker style of dress, particularly the
use of black leather. While this served a utilitarian purpose for the
bikers, in providing warmth and protection from "road rash", it was
primarily of fashion and fetishistic value to the leathermen, who for
the most part did not ride motorcycles extensively (although there have
been and are numerous gay leather motorcycle clubs).
Beginning in the late 1960s, heterosexual groups began to come together
to explore bondage and power exchange. With time, these groups have
grown and have raised their profile somewhat, to the point where most
U.S. cities of any size have one or more such groups. A major goal of
most of these groups is to provide semi-public opportunities for BDSM,
in an effort to provide a safe environment for relative strangers to
engage in such activities. As such, these groups attach high importance
to objective safety rules, such as the use of safewords.
Couples and bondage
Although reliable data is unavailable, the financial success of
companies that market bondage equipment testifies to the fact that it is
more than fantasy to many; it is plausible that a sizeable proportion of
couples have made regular use of bondage in their sexual activities at
some point in their relationships. This is especially plausible
considering that common household items can be used for play, such as
rope for restraint or a padlock for a ball lock.
For the most part, such bondage games end in sex. In contrast, bondage
games between more casually acquainted players in the BDSM subculture
frequently end in masturbation only, or in some cases include no sexual
release at all.
Safety rules followed by couples in a committed relationship are
frequently more subjective and trust-based. These differences can lead
to culture clash where a couple with a history of bondage games together
encounters the BDSM subculture: the couple can't understand the
insistence on safewords, while the members of the subculture can't
understand the focus on sexual intercourse.
Bondage erotica
Studies of men's sexual fantasies have shown that the fantasy of being
bound during intercourse is second in frequency only to the basic
fantasy of sex with a voluptuous nude woman. Consequently, it should be
no surprise that bondage themes have been present in pornography for
some time.
Bondage pornography for heterosexual men almost overwhelmingly depicts
bound women, rather than bound men, despite the most common fantasy in
both sexes being one of being bound.
There are also a few male bondage models in heterosexual erotica, but
most male bondage models appear in homosexual erotica. A small yet
profitable niche of male-in-bondage erotica includes men cross-dressed
and in bondage that caters toward heterosexual men.
Early examples of bondage erotica include:
Pauline Réage's Story of O
The artwork of Robert Bishop
F. E. Campbell's books
A. N. Roquelaure's (a pen name of Anne Rice) Sleeping Beauty novels
The bondage magazines of the 1970s onwards
Recent changes:
Steady growth in quantity and production values of niche producers
Increasing prevalence and acceptance of bondage in more mainstream
publications (e.g. Penthouse)
The rise of the Internet as a distribution medium
Technique
Bondage can be divided into six main categories:
Bondage that pulls parts of the body together (rope, straps, harnesses).
Bondage that spreads parts of the body apart (spreader bars, x-frames).
Bondage that ties the body down to another object (such as chairs or
stocks).
Bondage that suspends the body from another object (suspension bondage).
Bondage that restricts normal movement (hobble skirts, handcuffs, pony
harness).
Bondage that wraps the whole body or a part of it in bindings such as
cloth or plastic (saran wrap or cling film "mummification") as well as
sleepsack bondage.
Some of the large variety of restraints used in bondage:
Rope, often preferred because of its flexibility. Rigging, however,
requires considerable skill and practice to do safely.
Chains, including police handcuffs, thumbcuffs and belly chains.
Institutional restraints, including straitjackets.
Purpose-made bondage gear, such as monogloves, sleepsacks, bondage hooks
and bondage tables.
Handcuffs can be used to cuff ankles as well, sometimes even toe cuffs
are used.
Some simple bondage techniques:
Verbal bondage, in which (as the name suggests) the top simply tells the
bottom to do something.
Simply tying the hands together in front or behind.
Anchoring the hands to the front, back or sides of a belt at the waist.
A spread eagle, with the limbs splayed out and fastened by wrists and
ankles to bedposts, door frame or some other anchoring point.
A hogtie securing each wrist to its corresponding ankle behind the back
(wider, padded restraints such as bondage cuffs are recommended for
this).
The crotch rope involves pulling a rope between the labia to apply
pressure to the female genitals. Sometimes a knot is placed in the rope
at the position of the clitoris to intensify the sensation.
Some more complex techniques:
The reverse prayer position (not recommended unless the subject has
flexible shoulders).
An over-arm tie, in which the arms are brought over the head, and the
wrists fastened together behind the head and then by a length of rope,
chain or strapping to a belt at the waist.
There are also some common fantasy settings in
which bondage is often played:
Rape fantasy: The top fictitiously abducts the consenting bottom and has
complete control to do what he/she pleases.
Domination/slavery: A training session occurs in which rewards for
obedience and punishment for defiance are given. Humiliation is usually
involved.
Predicament bondage: The bottom is given a choice between two tortures.
For example, caning on the rear or flogging on the chest. If the bottom
cannot stand one any longer, the top will start the other. This can also
be done mechanically, like having a bottom squat and rigging a crotch
rope to tighten if they attempt to stand.
Bondage is often combined with other sexual and BDSM techniques. See the
list of bondage positions for more
details.
Technique in self-bondage is more complex, involving special methods to
apply the bondage to oneself, and also to effect a release after a
lapsed period of time. Self-bondage is also notably risky: see the
safety notes below.
Safety
Many people regard bondage as safe when conducted between sober, trusted
partners who are fully aware of the risks involved and the precautions
necessary to ensure safety. Partners who are in committed relationships
may have a greater basis for trusting each other. Performing acts in a
supervised location, such as a dungeon, closet, forest, or with a group
of trusted friends may also increase safety.
There is also a subculture of people who seek out others interested in
bondage and pursue such activities with people who they do not know
well. This subculture has given rise to the safe, sane and consensual
credo.
Safety precautions include:
The use of a "safeword", or some clear way for the subject to indicate
genuine distress and a wish to abort.
Never leaving a bound person alone.
Avoiding positions or restraints which may induce postural asphyxia.
Making sure that the subject changes positions at least once an hour (to
avoid circulation problems).
Making sure that the subject can be released quickly in an emergency.
Avoiding restraints which impair breathing. (Gags or hoods which block
the mouth can become asphyxial hazards if the subject vomits or the nose
becomes otherwise blocked.)
Remaining sober; alcohol and drugs should be avoided.
One very simple safety measure is to ask the subject every so often if
he or she is all right. Another is to check body parts like hands and
feet for numbness or coldness, which can happen if nerves have been
pinched or blood circulation has been blocked. Another is to check for
skin discoloration. Skin that does not get enough oxygen turns bluish.
If blood can get in, but can't get out because one of the veins has been
blocked, that part of the body turns purple.
If the subject has been gagged or can otherwise not verbally
communicate, a different form of the safeword is needed. For instance,
they may hum a simple tune, or opening and closing one or both hands
repeatedly, or releasing an object held in one hand (such as a rubber
ball, or a scarf).
Some simple preparations may also be helpful:
Food. It is surprisingly common for people (especially those on diets)
to faint during a long session. Having a regular meal beforehand is
recommended; being fed small snacks during play may also help avoid
fainting.
Cutting tools. A pair of EMT scissors is recommended (useful for safely
cutting rope and tape off skin).
Keyed-alike padlocks, if chains are being used.
It should be noted that scenes depicted in bondage photographs and
videos are chosen for their visual appeal and fantasy value. In most
cases they cannot be "acted out" with good results.
Self-bondage carries a higher risk, particularly because it violates the
first principle of bondage safety: to never leave a bound person alone.
Without someone to release them in the event of an emergency or medical
crisis, self-bondage can be lethal to its practitioners. It has been
estimated in the medical literature there are around 500-1000 deaths
every year in the United States due to autoerotic asphyxia
(self-strangulation) alone.
Why bondage?
People who find it erotic to be tied up find it so for a variety of
reasons:
The most frequently cited reason is a mental freedom from inhibitions
and responsibility since they have, in a way, given up control of the
sexual situation to follow. This is sometimes referred to as a "power
exchange."
Some like the tactile feeling of restraint, that is, the feeling of
pressure or pulling.
Some enjoy the feeling of helplessness for its own sake. Some like to
struggle aggressively against their bonds, particularly when being
sexually or otherwise stimulated. There are some in this category who
play bondage games that do not include a significant sexual component.
To intensify the experience of orgasm control or of
orgasm denial.
Some derive pleasure from symbolic degradation (less common). People who
enjoy role playing prison or mental hospital situations probably fit
best in this category.
Fetishistic interest in the mechanics of bondage, with particular
interest in the equipment and restraints used. Some of these people are
interested in the look, feel, and aroma of leather and rubber
restraints. Others are fascinated by the relationship between the
geometry of the tie, the degrees of freedom remaining and the feelings
elicited.
As an adjunct to other BDSM activities.
Like hang gliding or mountaineering, some feel that bondage allows them
to do something potentially dangerous in a safe way.
Extreme forms of bondage such as mummification some people enjoy because
it is like being placed in a sensory deprivation tank and may allow the
person being placed in extreme bondage to experience an out-of-body
experience.
In the wide range of human sexual experience, there are probably a few
other reasons.
People who enjoy tying other people up are motivated by a variety of
reasons, including:
Taking pleasure in the erotic submission of their partner.
The feeling of trust which comes from another person placing their
physical freedom in their hands
Wishing to please their partner, and the stimulation engendered by their
partner's pleasure in it
Fetishistic interest in the elegance of bondage, with particular
interest in the geometric patterns and symmetry (or artistic asymmetry)
of the restraint
Using bondage as an adjunct to other BDSM activities
Enjoyment of the power and control one has over a restrained partner;
people for whom this is a principal motivation may have trouble making
it much fun for the other person.
Bondage philosophy
Perhaps the most interesting and ardent "bondage philosopher" was Michel
Foucault. While it is believed Foucault had only a limited personal
involvement in the practice of bondage, he wrote a number of
intellectual explorations of BDSM culture. He was particularly
interested in the power relations that bondage brought to the surface,
and how these relations reflected upon a larger societal discourse. Of
further interest was the notion of a "Limit Experience", wherein the
participant attempted to navigate the line between the most intense
pleasure and nearly unbearable pain. While some have derided "Limit
Experience" as a perverse manifestation of the Freudian "death
instinct", Focault believed bondage could provide a safe and telling
environment for studying this concept.
Bondage and relationships
The mechanics of bondage are trivial compared to the relationship
issues.
Start with a committed relationship with a lot of trust and plenty of
sexual activity together.
Talk things through first.
Start slow and easy.
Take turns being the one being tied up.
Take the simple safety precautions listed above.
Some members of the BDSM subculture take another route and seek out
partners who share their interest in bondage. Many act out their bondage
fantasies within the confines of private "play" parties where overt
genital contact is not allowed between participants.
Some bondage practitioners go through a process often called
"negotiation" with potential partners, be they long time partners or
more casual relationships. Negotiation is essentially a conversation
conducted well before any sexual activity has begun in which each party
frankly outlines what they are interested in and what their boundaries
are, and out of that shared information comes to a mutual agreement
about potential bondage play in upcoming sexual activity. Although some
people may find this embarrassing at first, this frank and forthright
exchange allows both parties to feel confident about bondage activity
and to understand their partner's needs. Due to the vast range of
activities and intensities that are possible in bondage play and fetish
sex, negotiation is an excellent technique to make sure both parties
have realistic expectations and that the anticipated acts will be
enjoyable to all involved.
Depictions of
bondage in popular culture
Bondage received a positive (if brief) treatment in The Joy of Sex, a
mainstream sex manual popular in the 1970s. The publication of Madonna's
book, Sex, which included photographs of bound nudes, did a great deal
to improve public awareness and acceptance of bondage.
By the 1990s, references to bondage could be found in mainstream
prime-time television series such as Buffy the Vampire Slayer, where
equipment such as handcuffs or collars and concepts such as the safeword
were included as a matter of course.
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| BDSM
Glossary
24/7: A relationship in which protocols are in
place continuously.
Animal transformation fantasy: Fantasy in which the focus is on
the sub entering the altered mindspace of a different species, typically
a dog, pony or horse.
Abrasion: Using something rough (such as sandpaper).
Aftercare: The time after a BDSM scene or play session in which
the participants calm down, discuss the previous events and their
personal reactions to them, and slowly come back in touch with reality.
BDSM often involves an endorphin high and very intense experience, and
failure to engage in proper aftercare can lead to subdrop as these
return to more everyday levels. BDSM experiences can be exhausting,
depleting the submissive's internal resources. As a result, frequently
the submissive requires emotional support, comfort, reassurances, and/or
physical tenderness. Along with this, he or she may experience
everything from an exhilaration to traumatization. It also may include a
review or “debriefing” of the activities from experiences of both the
dominant and the submissive. How soon this occurs, after such a
“session”, will vary. Submissives may report needing to be left alone or
other means of processing the experience. While the desire to be left
alone could stem from just needing rest, it could also result from
her/him no longer feeling safe in the current environment or situation.
Ageplay: Usually referring to daddy/daughter or mommy/baby role
play. Does not usually include or imply aspects of incest, but rather
the nurturing relationship of parent/child or teacher/student.
Anal torture: The BDSM practice of inflicting pain on the anus.
This can include insertion of painful objects into the anus or
subjecting the anus to hot or cold temperatures. Anal torture is
considered a riskier activity among BDSM practices because the body
tissues involved are very delicate.
Animal Play: The sub acts or dresses like an animal (puppy, pony,
cow, etc.).
Auctioned off: Dominant auctions off the slave to the highest
bidder (usually supervised and for temporary use).
Bad pain: Good pain and bad pain are terms used lightheartedly by
BDSM practitioners, signifying that whilst BDSM may include an element
(often quite pronounced) consensual pain, there is a purpose to it, and
some pain is consented to and accepted whilst other pain is not. "Bad
pain" is pain which is outside hard limits, non-mutual or non-valued,
not wished for, and of limited or no value in this context.
BDSM: Bondage/Discipline, Dominance/Submission, Sadism/Masochism
Black sheet party: An orgy for people into BDSM sex.
Bondage: Acts involving the physical restraint of a partner.
Bondage typically refers to total restraint, however it can be limited
to a particular body part, such as breast bondage.
Bondage wheel: A bondage wheel is one of the largest (and most
expensive) pieces of SM equipment found in a BDSM dungeon. It consists
of a large vertically mounted rotating wheel to which the bondage
subject is strapped. In this respect it is similar to a Saint Andrew's
Cross. The difference is the bondage wheel can be rotated allowing the
subject to be turned upside down. The subject can either be strapped
facing the wheel (suitable for whipping) or facing out (for genital
access).
The wheel body has various straps for restraint and normally also
attachments for extra rope bondage. There may also be foot rests, hand
holds and a head support. The vast majority of bondage wheels are
mounted on walls and there are only two known self standing wheels in
the United States.
Bottom: submissive or one who gives up control, or simply one who
receives physical sensation from a top in a scene.
Breast bondage: The act of tying female breasts so that they are
either flattened against the chest or so that they bulge.
Breath Control: The dominant controls the submissive's breathing.
Butt plug: Much like a dildo, only shaped slightly differently.
The flared base allows for safe anal penetration. They come in a variety
of sizes; some can vibrate.
Chastity: A form of erotic sexual denial or orgasm denial whereby
a person is prevented from access to, or stimulation of, their genitals,
save at the whim or choice of their partner, usually by means of a
device (called a chastity belt or sometimes for men a cock cage) that
prevents contact and is controlled by means of a lock by the partner.
CBT: Cock and ball torture
Collared: Submissive or slave who is owned, usually (but
certainly not exclusively) in a loving intimate relationship. A dominant
may have multiple persons collared
Collaring: The formal acceptance by a dominant, of a sub's
service. Also the ceremony when a dominant commits to a sub (much like a
wedding or other contract).
Consent: Mutual agreement to the terms of a scene or ongoing bdsm
relationship.
Consensual non-consensuality: A mutual agreement that within
defined limits, or subject to a safe word or other restrictions, and
common sense, consent will be given as read without foreknowledge of the
exact actions planned. As such, it is a show of trust and understanding
and usually undertaken only by partners who know each other well, or
otherwise agree to set clear safe limits on their activities.
Contract: A written-out agreement between the dominant &
submissive. It can be either formal or non, and is usually written after
much negotiation by the dominant and the sub, outlining what structure,
guidelines, rules and boundaries to the relationship are agreed upon by
the two . It is not legally binding. See
Negotiation (BDSM)
Crux decussata: See St. Andrew's Cross
DM: Dungeon Monitor, a person who volunteers to supervise the
interactions between participants at a play party to ensure their
safety.
Demimonde: (French for "half-world") Demimonde is a polite 19th
century term that was often used the same way we use the term "mistress"
today. In the 19th century it primarily referred to a class of women on
the fringes of respectable society supported by wealthy lovers (usually
each had several). The term is also used to refer to these women as a
group, and the social circles they moved in. As a group, the demimonde
did not form a 'society' any more than modern prostitutes form a
society. However, they did represent a specific class of women in the
latter half of the 19th century and into the early 20th century who,
though not respectable, were commonplace fixtures in the upper class of
French, English and, to some extent, American society. In the United
States and Britain, they were (and still are) also often referred to as
courtesans, though the term courtesan in the 19th century applied to a
profession (as the term "prostitute" describes a profession), whereas
Demimonde/Demimondaine was used to describe a broader social class of
persons. The term is French, and means literally "half-world", implying
those who existed on the fringes of the "real world."
Dom: Man or woman who takes control (from dominant)
Dominant Man or woman who takes control
Domme: Woman who takes control (see also Dominatrix)
D/s: Domination/submission
Dungeon: Usually referring to a room or area with BDSM equipment
and play space
Edgeplay: SM play which pushes the limits of the persons
involved. This can be potentially dangerous activities such as fire,
electricity, cutting, or breath play, but often isn't dangerous with the
properly skills and experience.
Endorphin rush: Endorphins are the chemicals responsible for the
"high" people often get from activities such as sex, or high-risk
sports, and is the body's response to heightened or intense experiences
of certain kinds. BDSM activities, especially those incorporating a
degree of sensation play often cultivate the endorphin rush as part of
their "payoff" to the sub. But also see aftercare for the care needed to
ensure that subdrop does not occur afterwards as the body returns to
normal.
Erotic sexual denial: keeping another person aroused while
delaying or preventing resolution of the feelings, to keep them in a
continual state of anticipatory tension and inner conflict, and
heightened sensitivity. (see also tease and denial and chastity).
FemDom: Term used to describe female Dominance, especially when
referring to BDSM images.
FemSub: Term used to describe female submissive, especially when
referring to BDSM images.
Fetish: A specific obsession or delight in one object or experience.
Fire play: Using flammable liquids to create quick, fleeting
instances of flame on the skin of the bottom. Risk of injury is
increased and the top should be learned with fire play skills.
Genitorture: Torture of the genitals
Good pain: Good pain and bad pain are terms used lightheartedly
by BDSM practitioners, signifying that whilst BDSM may include an
element (often quite pronounced) of consensual pain, there is a purpose
to it, and some pain is consented to and accepted whilst other pain is
not. "Good pain" is therefore pain that is mutually agreed, desired or
permitted by the submissive partner to be experienced, and seen by them
as of enjoyment or value.
Golden showers: Urinating on, or being urinated on by, another
person.
Gorean: A BDSM sub-genre based upon the rituals and practices
created within the world of Gor in the erotic novels by John Norman.
Gunplay: The practice of including actual (or simulated) firearms
into a scene.
Handkerchief codes: Visible signs to indicate to others your area
of BDSM interest
Hard limits: What someone absolutely will not do, usually
non-negotiable.
Handkerchief code: The handkerchief code, also known as the hanky
code, bandana code or flagging is a way of indicating, usually among gay
male casual sex seekers or BDSM practitioners in leather subculture in
the US, Canada & Europe, whether they are a top or bottom, and what kind
of sex they are seeking, by wearing cotton color-coded kerchiefs
(bandanas), usually in the back pocket. This code was widely used in the
1970s, but is much less used today. (The terms bandana code, hanky code,
or flagging are much more widely used among those in the leather
subculture than the term handkerchief code.)
Harem: A group of subs serving one or more dominants.
Impact play: Part of sensation play, dealing with impact such as
whips, riding crops, paddles, floggers, etc.
Infantilism: Parent/child or parent/baby role playing.
Knife play: Slow, methodical sensation of the bottom with the
edges and points of knives, usually without cutting the skin. Fear of
the weapon plays a large part in the stimulus of the bottom.
Limits: What someone "won't" do or is hesitant to do
Masochism: Act of receiving pain for sensual/sexual pleasure.
Masochist: Person who enjoys pain, usually sexually.
Mummification: Immobilizing the body by wrapping it up, usually
with multiple layers of tight thin plastic sheeting. Breathing and other
safety measures must be appropriately taken care of, often by leaving
the face (or at least the mouth and nose) open. Body temperature
(maintained to an extent by movement) may also be affected so a warm
environment and warm aftercare may be important. Mummification is often
used to enhance a feeling of total bodily helplessness, and incorporated
with sensation play.
Munch: A group of people that are into BDSM meeting at a
"vanilla" place. Sometimes this is a club. You might see an announcement
like, "This weekend's munch is at Denny's"
Nyotaimori: Human platters
Needle play: Temporary piercings done with sterile needles of
varying gauges, usually only for the duration of a scene.
Newbie: Someone new to BDSM.
OTK: Over the knee (spanking).
Painslut: A person who enjoys receiving a heavy degree of pain
but may or may not necessarily enjoy submitting.
Paraphilia
Play party: A BDSM event involving many people engaging in
scenes.
ProDom: Male professional dominant (charges money)
ProDomme: Female professional dominant (charges money)
Ponygirl or Ponyboy: Sub is dressed in a pony outfit, with mouth
bit and anal plug with a tail. They are told to prance or behave like a
pony.
Puppy Play: Sub is made to act like a puppy. Sub barks, whines,
eats from a bowl, etc. Such play is almost never sexual, but rather
focuses on the altered mind-space of bottom/pup.
RACK - Risk Aware Consensual Kink
Rape fantasy: The pleasurable fantasy of inflicting or being a
victim to an act of consensual play-rape.
Sadism: The act of inflicting pain.
Sadist: Person who enjoys inflicting pain, usually sexually.
Safe, Sane and Consensual - SSC
Safeword - When a participant utters a safeword, BDSM activity
stops.
Saltires - saltire cross: See St. Andrew's Cross.
St. Andrew's Cross: The St. Andrew's Cross, Crux decussata,
X-cross or saltire cross, is a common sight in BDSM dungeons because of
its practicality and ease of manufacture. It typically provides
restraining points for ankles, wrists, and waist, and is usually
strongly attached to a wall.
Some saltires are attached to a central hinge, allowing the subject to
be spun and inverted: see also bondage wheel.
Freestanding saltires have a tendency to be unstable, and a writhing
subject can sometimes turn them over, so great caution needs to be
exercised in their use. Some freestanding crosses include footrests that
greatly improve safety and stability.
The name comes from the Crux decussata (diagonal cross) that Saint
Andrew is said to have been martyred on.
Scat play: Feces play
Scene: A time period of BDSM activities.
Sensation play: BDSM play where the intent is to push people's
sensory limits, thus exploring texture, sensory deprival, through to
whips, flaggillation and edgeplay.
Sensory deprivation: The deliberate reduction or removal of
stimuli from one or more of the senses. Simple devices such as
blindfolds or hoods and earmuffs can cut off sight and hearing
respectively, while more complex devices can also cut off the sense of
smell, touch, taste, thermoception (heat-sense), and 'gravity'. Sensory
deprivation has been used in various alternative medicines and in
psychological experiments (e.g., see Isolation tank), and for torture or
punishment.
Session: A time period of BDSM activities with a ProDom/me.
Slave: Person who gives up a great degree of control in an
ongoing D/s relationship, sometimes with few remaining limits. Often
those who identify as "slave" have a great desire for being of service
to their dominant, sometimes referred to as "service-oriented
submission."
Slave Position: Also called the pleasure position. Sub is
kneeling, legs spread, head down and hands on thighs, with palms up
Soft Limits: Something that someone is hesitant to do or nervous
to try. They can sometimes be talked into the activity, or preferably it
may be negotiated at a trial or beginner level into a scene.
Subdrop: A physical condition, often with cold- or flu-like
symptoms, experienced by a submissive after an intense session of BDSM
play. This can last for as long as a week, and is best prevented by
aftercare immediately after the session.
submissive, or "sub" for short: Person that gives up control
either all the time or only during a scene
Subspace: A "natural high" that a sub gets during a scene or when
being controlled. The sub may feel disconnected from time, space, and/or
their body, and may have limited ability to communicate. It is critical
that a Dom(me) be aware of their sub's wellbeing if they are in
subspace.
switch: Someone who likes being both Dominant and submissive,
either in one scene or on different occasions.
Taken in hand: 24/7 Male dominance in monogamous marriage, with
or without BDSM aspects.
Tease and denial: Keeping another person aroused while delaying
or preventing resolution of the feelings, to keep them in a continual
state of anticipatory tension and inner conflict, and heightened
sensitivity. (see also orgasm denial).
Tit torture: The act of causing deliberate physical pain to the
breasts and nipples.
Top: Dominant person either all the time or only during a scene.
Topping from the bottom: A submissive who nonetheless wants to
direct the top.
Training: Either referring to a short period of time (a scene) or
an ongoing effort of the dominant teaching the submissive how to act.
Vanilla: Someone who is not in the lifestyle. Alternatively,
sexual behavior which does not encompass BDSM activity. The term is
sometimes used in a derogatory sense.
Wannabe: Someone who thinks or claims to be knowledgeable about
BDSM, but is not. Especially prevalent with new dominants.
WIITWD: What it is that we do. A broad term referring to all
forms of alternative sexuality.
Wax play: The dominant drips hot wax on the sub.
X-cross: See St. Andrew's Cross.
YKINOK: YKINOK is an acronym for "Your Kink Is Not OK" (used on
Usenet since at least 1993), and is generally used in the BDSM
sub-culture to deprecate those who condemn any sexual preferences other
than those actual practices (not mere fantasies) which violate the
principles of "Safe, Sane and Consensual" or "Risk Aware Consensual
Kink." In other words, "YKINOK" is not actually commonly used to condemn
other people's kinks, but is used to condemn those who condemn other
people's kinks. YKINOK is contrasted with YKIOK,IJNMK, which means "Your
Kink Is OK, It's Just Not My Kink." YKIOK,IJNMK was one of the
cornerstone ideas of the alt.sex.bondage newsgroup in the 1990's and
embodies the principle of tolerating other people's consensual kinks
even if one finds them uninteresting or repulsive. YKINMK (Your Kink Is
Not My Kink) is a common expression among fanfiction enthusiasts and is
usually taken as having a similar meaning to YKIOK,IJNMK.
Zentai: Skin tight suits that cover the entire body are commonly
called zentai (from the Japanese ゼンタイ). This is either a contraction of
zenshin taitsu (全身タイツ) ("full-body tights") or a direct translation of
"full body" (全体 zentai). Zentai is most commonly made using
nylon/spandex blends, but other materials such as cotton and wool are
used as well. Such suits were first developed for use in modern dance,
but are now used in the arts to diminish the presence of an actor in a
scene.
With practical uses aside, zentai is also strongly associated with
spandex fetishism. Some zentai fetishists are after the experience of
total enclosure, while for others it provides a way to anonymously enjoy
exhibitionism. One might also experience it as a form of sexual bondage,
even though it does not restrict the motion of the body or even act as
an effective blindfold
Zipper (BDSM): In BDSM terms, a zipper is a string of clothespins
or other clips, held together loosely by a cord or light chain.
The skin is clipped in the clips for a short time, then the cord is
pulled causing the clips to be pulled off the skin one by one in
sequence causing a "zip" sound, and a unique sensation. Zippers come in
many sizes and varied numbers of clips, as many as a hundred can be used
in one zipper. They are a very popular home-made BDSM toy.
Note that some people in the BDSM community begin
dominant terms with an upper case, for example: Top, Master, Dom, Domme,
etc, as well as to begin submissive terms with a lower case, even where
normally incorrect, chiefly in acronyms and abbreviations, such as D/s
for Dom/sub.
In addition, high protocol refers to groups that adhere to strict roles
and role-based rules of conduct, whereas low protocol refers to groups
that are more relaxed. Old Guard refers to high protocol groups,
particularly gay leather BDSM groups.
Back to top |
Limits (BDSM)
In the BDSM world, limits refer to activities that a partner feels
strongly about, and to which special attention must be paid.
Before a BDSM scene, it is common to perform a negotiation to outline
what will and will not happen during the play session. During this time,
all participants outline what they desire and what they will not
tolerate. This is the time to discuss limits.
Both dominants and submissives can express limits. They can be spoken or
written, and discussing them fully usually results in an improved
experience for all involved.
Popular variants include:
Hard Limit – something that must not be done. Violating a hard
limit is often considered just cause for ending a scene or even a
relationship. Examples include “scat is a hard limit for me” or “I have
a back injury, so striking on the back is a hard limit”.
Soft Limit – something that someone will do only in special
circumstances or when highly aroused. Example - “I will only do anal sex
with a very experienced partner”.
"Must" limit – something that a person will not do the scene without.
Examples include “lots of hair pulling is a must-limit for me” or “If
you’re going to flog me, I’ll need lots of aftercare”.
Time limit – an amount of time after which play ceases.
No Limits – the dominant may do anything he or she cares to with
the submissive. This is usually a sign of an inexperienced player who
does not yet know what their limits are. In reality, even the most
hardened and experienced players have limits. “No limits” play is more
the stuff of porn and thriller movies than in actual, real-life BDSM.
This is also sometimes used as a term for TPE or Total Power Exchange.
Back to top |
| BONDAGE POSITIONS
Safety
As with all forms of BDSM activity, safety must be of paramount concern.
Any technique or device that severely limits the ability of a subject to
move their body and/or head freely, or puts them in an awkward position
for a prolonged period, can result in a stiff neck, blood flow problems
or nerve-based effects such as numbness. Knowledge, care and close
supervision are required to avoid any permanent injury.
Ball tie The ball tie or
balltie is a bondage position in which a person is bound into a "ball".
The legs should be bent double so the heels touch the bottom; the legs
should also be brought up so that the thighs are pressed against the
chest. Pressing the thighs against the abdomen may restrict breathing.
Normally, the hands are fastened behind the back. There may also be
elbow bondage, or the arms may be in a reverse prayer position. There
may be ropes round the arms and torso (or arms and legs) to hold the
arms against the back. Alternatively, the arms may be hugging the legs,
possibly with each wrist bound to the opposite elbow. Often, the ankles
are tied together, as are the knees. Sometimes, when a woman is
bound, she wears high-heeled shoes and has ropes wrapped round the heels
and fixed to her wrists. This adds to the visual impact, but should only
be used as a supplement to other secure bondage; if it takes the main
strain, the shoes may come off or the heels may break off. The head
may be pulled back in some way; see head bondage. However, some purists
argue that this goes against the idea of binding into a ball.
Alternatively, the head can be pulled forward to force the chin to press
against the chest. The position is both very stringent and (some
would argue) stimulating. The ball tie is one of the positions
possible in self-bondage, but mobility is so limited that several
independent escape mechanisms should be used, in addition to the usual
safety advice.
Breast bondage Breast bondage is a
technique used in BDSM play. It differs from most bondage techniques in
that it is not intended to restrict the mobility of the tied person
directly. However, it can do so indirectly when it is combined with
other techniques. A bondage harness can also be used to achieve the same
effect as breast bondage. Sometimes, nipple clamps are placed on the
nipples or other, more involved methods of tit torture are combined with
breast bondage for a greater erotic effect. Methods 1/4
inch ropes, ribbon, or leather straps are used to flatten the breasts.
Chains can also be used, having the advantage of increased sensational
awareness through their coldness which can be increased by prepping in a
freezer. In breast binding, it is also common for bandages, plastic
wraps, and duct tape to flatten breasts, nipples, and areolas.
Techniques Ropes are tied around the base of each breast, causing
the breasts to bulge outwards. Usually, the same rope is used for both
breasts so that the rope harness is automatically held together at the
front. The rope may then also be fixed behind the back, to make a sort
of bra. For this to work, the tied person needs large breasts; it is
rarely possible to do it to a male. Another technique is to put a
rope round the torso just above the breasts, and another one just below
them, then push the ropes together to squeeze the breasts from the top
and bottom, as shown at right. This can be done instead of, or as well
as, the other method. A rope can also be passed over the shoulders and
between the breasts, drawing the rope above and below the breasts
together, then pass back over the shoulders to the knots at the back.
The primary rope can be used to place cinches between the arms and the
body. This technique is often combined with elbow bondage, to make
the breasts stick out even more, as shown in the picture above. When
using elbow bondage in an advanced method, the elbow ropes as they pass
under the shoulders and behind the neck can draw the ropes above and
below the breasts together at the sides of the breasts, thus resulting
in rope effectively surrounding the breasts. Alternatively, the ropes
across the back can be linked to a box tie or a reverse prayer position.
Effect and other uses Apart from the visual appearance of the
breasts being lifted, the pressure that is applied results in a
reduction in blood flow, and a further swelling and firming of the
breasts. This makes them very sensitive, especially the nipples and
surrounding areas, and it can be quite pleasurable to the bound person
when they are stimulated. Conversely, if nipple clamps are used, the
nipples will be particularly sensitive to this and the degree of pain
significantly greater. Rubber bands around the breasts have also been
used with breast bondage to increase this effect still further, but can
lead to a dangerous restriction in blood flow. Breast bondage can
play an integral part in suspension bondage. If the subject is being
suspended, particularly in a horizontal position such as a suspended
hogtie, breast bondage is used as the main supporting area under the
chest. If there are ropes above and below the breasts at the upper
chest, the weight of the upper body is taken by these ropes. With so
much pressure in this area, the rope must be precisely placed or once
again blood flow could be reduced. The Japanese use a sophisticated form
of breast bondage called "Ushiro Takatekote." Similar to breast bondage
combined with a box tie, it is often used in suspension bondage.
Crotch rope In Japanese bondage a crotch rope (Sukaranbo or
Mata Nawa) is a rope harness tied around the hips and passing between
the labia to apply pressure to the female genitals. Sometimes a knot is
tied at the position of the clitoris to intensify the pressure. The aim
is to generate thoughts of sexual submission and excitement in the
person thus tied. A crotch rope may be tied over the clothing or on to a
naked person. Crotch ropes are also common in Western-style bondage.
They appear regularly in the work of Robert Bishop.
Frogtie Each leg is frogtied (ankle tied to
thigh).The frogtie is a bondage position in which a person's legs are
bound ankle-to-thigh, in the likeness of a crouched frog. The wrists on
each side are often then tied to the wrist/thigh combination on their
respective sides. This tie places the person in a position where they
are vulnerable but not completely immobilised and can still move about,
albeit in a very awkward crawling motion. The frogtie, with the person
restrained so, can also be used as a restrictive sex position or as a
basis for far more restrictive bondage. In a similar position, the
person's wrists are simply bound to their corresponding ankles. However,
that position cannot be fully considered as a frogtie, because it does
not match the "bound ankle-to-thigh" condition.
Head bondage Head bondage, in BDSM play, includes all
techniques used to apply control to the head of the subject. It may
refer to one of several techniques: It may refer to encasing the head
in a bondage hood, a head harness or a box, or the use of a device such
as a Scold's bridle (also referred to as a branks). A head harness may
include a blindfold and/or gag. The encasement may include or be
supplemented by a wide, stiff posture collar round the neck to restrict
movement of the head. It may refer to the use of rope or other material
to achieve control of the head. In particular, it may refer to pulling
the head backwards by hair bondage or a rope attached to the back or top
of a hood or head harness. It is also possible to use a rope attached to
a blindfold or gag, but this is usually less secure and may cause
excessive pressure on a small part of the face; in particular, with a
gag, the corners of the mouth may be injured.
Extreme caution should always be used in any type of head bondage.
Hogtie bondage The hogtie, when used
in sexual bondage play, is a bondage position involving the tying of a
person's wrists and ankles in some form behind their back, in order to
restrain them, possibly for further BDSM play. The hogtie is a complex
bondage position; it can, and often does, involve many other aspects of
bondage play and equipment. Definition The bondage hogtie
typically has the person who is being tied lie down flat on the belly,
with the ankles and wrists tied together behind the back of the person.
In common terminology within BDSM play, however, a hogtie is any
position that results in the arms and legs being bound behind the
person. There is a significant risk of postural asphyxia in this
position, in addition to the normal risks of restraint. Aspects of
use in sexual bondage The hogtie position in itself is
particularly stringent as it places pressure on the abdomen, which might
create difficulty in breathing. Depending on the flexibility of the
person, even a "light" hogtie can be very uncomfortable and sometimes
cannot be maintained for very long. The classic hogtie position has
the wrists bound together then tied to the ankles. Depending on the
person, this may be neither a particularly stringent nor an inescapable
position. This method leaves the opportunity for the tied person to free
themselves from the hogtie, as they may be able to reach any of the
knots with their fingers. Many feel the only proper way for a female to
be hogtied is with bare feet, as it shows vulnerability, subservience
and sexuality. Model is also wearing a ball gag. The tied person can
also be on his or her back. This can get uncomfortable after a while.
Most people can turn over onto their front while hogtied, but if they
are on a narrow sofa or bed, there is a danger of falling off,
especially if they are blindfolded so they cannot see what they are
doing. Tension can be relieved by rolling onto one's side. However, if
the position is sufficiently stringent, the bound person may not be able
to roll themselves onto their side at Advanced use in sexual
bondage The tied person might be left in a kneeling position
(pictured) with the feet off the ground. It is not very difficult to get
into a lying down position (on front, back or side), but it may be
almost impossible to return to a kneeling position if the person is tied
correctly. A person may also be tied into this position using ropes tied
to the ceiling securing them in place. This leaves the person balanced
on their knees in a very difficult position to maintain. This method
of suspension bondage can take two forms. The first method starts with a
conventional rope based hogtie, then by placing extra ropes around the
upper body above and below the breasts as well as around the folded
legs, these ropes can be used to lift the person into the air. Ropes can
be placed in different areas to reduce the strain on the body being
lifted in this manner. The second method is far simpler, but has much
greater risk of dislocation of the arms. The person may be tied with
rope, but to reduce strain on the wrists and ankles suspension cuffs may
be used. With the person lying on their stomach, their wrists and ankles
are bound together, then from this point to the suspension line. When
lifted, the person is suspended with their arms and legs behind them
with all their weight taken by the wrists and ankles. While this
position is completely inescapable, it is also a very stringent and
painful position and can easily lead to serious injury if not practiced
correctly. Extensions and variants Often, additional
bondage is combined with a hogtie. The knees are often tied together. A
rope around the torso and arms, pressing the arms against the back,
makes the arms more immobile. With a more flexible person, it is
possible to add other bondage techniques such as elbow bondage, breast
bondage, and crotch ropes. Having the head pulled back can also greatly
increase the stringency of the position. A variation to the hogtie is
to tie the ankles to suitably tied elbow bondage. Depending on how close
the ankles are drawn towards the elbow ropes, this can greatly increase
the amount of tension that can be placed on the body, as well as leaving
the knots controlling the position well out of reach of the bound
person. Other hogtie positions may have the arms folded behind the
back (possibly in a box tie) and the legs tied in a folded position by
having ropes or leather straps around the ankle or shin and the thigh,
keeping the leg in a fully bent position. With the arms in a box tie,
drawing the ankles to be near the arms causes the back to arch.
Lotus tie The lotus tie is a bondage
position used in BDSM play. It should not be confused with the lotus
fold, another name for the Savage fold. In this tie, the lower legs
are placed together but pointing in opposite directions, so that each
foot is near the knee of the other leg. Two ropes are tied round the
legs, each round one ankle and the other leg just below the knee. The
legs are thus held in a triangle with the thighs spread wide apart. This
permits easy access to the crotch if desired. Sometimes just one rope is
tied, half-way between the knees and ankles, but this allows more
movement of the legs and may be easier to escape from. Alternatively,
the ankles can be bound to the opposite thighs just above the knee,
though many people find this a difficult position to sustain for long.
As this tie only immobilizes the legs, it is normally combined with some
form of arm bondage. If the wrists are tied to the legs, it forms a
stringent hogtie. The name derives from its similarity to the lotus
position in yoga.
Over-arm tie An over-arm tie is
a bondage position in which the arms are brought over the head, and the
wrists fastened together behind the head and then by a length of rope,
chain or strapping to a belt at the waist. Sometimes, the rope goes
between the legs and is fastened in front, forming a crotch rope. In
this position, the elbows stick out on each side, level with the head.
Pretzel hogtie A pretzel hogtie is an extremely stringent
form of hogtie bondage. The wrists are tied behind the back, and the
knees, ankles and big toes tied together. The person is gagged and/or
blindfolded. The bound person's wrists are tied tightly to the ankle
ropes or knee ropes. A rope is then passed from a shoulder harness to
the ankle ropes and tightened until the body bends into an arch. Another
rope goes from the back of the gag or the blindfold to the big toes, and
tightened so as to pull the head and neck back. An anchor to a gag
makes the gag more secure and effective, but there are advantages in
anchoring the toe rope to a head harness or bondage hood rather than a
gag or blindfold, as these will spread the strain on the face better
(see head bondage). If the wrists are tied to the ankles, they will
be pulled with the ankles towards the shoulders. This causes the elbows
to move apart, so elbow bondage is not practicable. If the wrists are
tied to the knees, elbow bondage may be possible. However, this will
make an already stringent hogtie even more stringent.
Most people cannot endure this position, and
very few can stand it for more than a short time. It can be very painful
and can easily lead to serious injury if not practiced correctly and
constantly supervised
Reverse prayer position
The Reverse prayer position, a technique used in BDSM play, involves
restraint of a person's arms by binding them behind the person's back,
with the hands placed between the shoulders, palm to palm, and the
wrists bound together. It is thus similar to the traditional prayer
position, but with the arms behind, rather than in front of, the bound
person, thus preventing use of the arms. Many people find this position
painful after a time, and cramps may set in. Thus, someone bound in this
position may need careful monitoring. To immobilize the arms further,
ropes or a strap are often placed round the arms and torso, pressing the
arms against the back. On a woman, this can conveniently be linked to
ropes for breast bondage. Another technique is to fix ropes from the
elbows to a belt or other ropes round the body. In bondage fiction,
people in this position are sometimes forced to have their elbows
touching, turning this into a form of elbow bondage. Very few people can
adopt this position without dislocation of the shoulders. However, with
many people, it is possible to press the elbows together slightly and
tie them in that position. The reverse prayer position (without any
bondage) is also used in some yoga exercises.
Bondage rope harness A bondage rope harness, sometime also
referred to as a bondage web, rope web, rope dress or karada, is a
bondage technique involving the tying of an intricate structure of rope
around the body in a complex web-like fashion. Similar in effect to a
leather bondage harness, a bondage rope harness is not in itself
normally used to bind a person, but it does apply pressure over the area
bound and can be used as a securing point for other bondage techniques,
including suspension bondage. It is not normally used to bind the limbs
but you can bind the arms into the harness by simply going around the
arms not under, as shown in the picture. A rope dress is often used
with, or integrated with, a crotch rope and/or a shinju ("pearl") breast
harness. A rope dress typically takes around 10-15 m of rope to tie,
and involves multiple passes of rope from front to back around the body
to build up the characteristic diamond-shaped rope pattern, typically
starting from a rope halter (as in the illustration) and moving down the
body. In some cases, a rope harness may extend beyond the torso, into
diamond-patterned webs that extend down the length of the arms or legs.
The Japanese term karada means simply "body". Traditionally, a
distinction was made between kikkou ("turtle-shell" pattern; hexagonal)
and hishi (diamond) patterned ties, although many modern sources just
use the term kikkou to refer to any rope body harness.
Shrimp tie A shrimp tie (also known as
an Ebi or Kuri) is a type of Shibari bondage. It originated over 300
years ago in Japan as a torture and interrogation technique. The
procedure is as follows: A chest harness of rope is tied.
The arms folded across the front of the chest, and tied with the
fingertips of each hand touching the elbow of the opposite arm. The
wrists are attached to the chest harness. This is done most easily by
tying ropes around the torso and chest harness. Their ankles are
tied crossed as they sit on the floor; this forces their shins to be at
right angles to each other with the knees wide apart. The ends of
the ankle rope are pulled up to the chest harness, forcing the legs up.
These ends are tucked into the harness. The ropes are pulled until
the ankles touch the chest, and are tied off.
If there is any free rope, it may be run round the back of the tied
person's neck and tied off. Alternatively, the loose end may be wrapped
round other ropes and tied off.
Spreadeagle The spreadeagle position, or spread-eagle is the
position in which a person has arms outstretched and legs apart,
figuratively resembling an eagle with wings spread. In B&D, the sex
position in which one partner is supine or (less commonly) prone in a
spreadeagle. It is a classic ingredient in sexual roleplay, especially
roleplay involving spanking and/or a uniformed top. It can also refer to
a bondage position in which the person's wrists and ankles are tied to
the four corner-posts of a bed. Being relatively simple, a
spreadeagle tie can be improvised using household items and little
experience. Improvising further, additional household items can be used,
such as a common padlock for use as a ball lock being careful not to get
skin caught in the mechanism, which will add surprise to a male subject.
In an upright spreadeagle, the person's wrists and ankles are instead
bound to anchoring points on a wall or restraining equipment like a
Saint Andrew's Cross. This position is favored for some BDSM games,
because it leaves the person open for various activities such as impact
play.
Shibari: See Japanese
bondage
Strappado bondage
Strappado bondage is a term describing a position and technique used in
BDSM play. A person's arms are bound behind their back, then by use of
some method of attachment such as a rope or chain that runs from their
wrists to a securing point above, their arms are lifted up behind them
until the person is forced to bend forward. The term "strappado" used
to describe this position refers to a method of torture that is still
practiced in some countries today, and has its roots in a form of
medieval torture by the same name. While the strappado bondage position
is considered to be a form of BDSM "play", it shares its basic
principles of restraint with the method of torture and therefore can
very easily become just that if not practised safely. In particular,
there is a risk of the sort of injuries discussed in the strappado
article. Techniques While the general principle of a
bondage strappado remains the same - with the arms bound upwards behind
the subject - there are various different methods and styles used to
achieve this. The different styles can be summarised as follows and
several can be combined: legs apart - spreader bar or attachment
points
legs together elbows bound / not bound rope around
neck/collar pulling down to force increased bend (it is important to ensure that there is no
pressure on the front of the neck) hair bondage or other head
bondage to pull head back
Also, the person may have a gag or blindfold. The exact technique
used is very much related to the purpose of using this particular
position in BDSM play: To reduce or inhibit the subject's ability to
struggle by placing the body in an awkward position such that any
struggling on their part could result in them losing balance. As a
result of this, it is the bound subject who chooses not to move for fear
of falling over. To create a sense of vulnerability in the subject's
mind by exposing their buttocks and genital area. The more common
method of strappado often depicted in BDSM publications has the
subject's legs bound together at the ankles and just above the knees.
The arms may or may not be bound at the elbows. The arms are pulled up
behind the subject and they are placed into the strappado position. A
variation on this is to tie a loose-fitting rope around the subject's
neck and to tie this rope to the ankle ropes, causing the subject to
bend over more. This result in them having to bend their knees and push
their buttocks further out. A collar around the neck is a safer method
for securing the rope, as a loose rope can tighten and strangle the
person. A different style is to make use of a spreader bar. By
keeping the legs far apart both the sense of imbalance as well as that
of vulnerability is increased. Making the subject wear high-heeled shoes
in this position helps still further. If the elbows are to be bound
together, even for very flexible people it is rarely possible to bind
them touching together. As the arms are lifted towards a horizontal
position in relation to the position of the subject's torso, the
shoulder joints shift into a different position preventing the usual
movement that occurs when the elbows are drawn together. Other rope
techniques are sometimes added such as a crotch rope and breast bondage.
The use of tight-fitting garments such as a corset increases the visual
appeal of the position as well as restricting the subject's movements.
The use of head bondage allows the subject's head to be pulled back to a
front-facing position as opposed to hanging towards the floor. In
addition to the restrictiveness that this causes, if a suitable ring gag
is used the subject may feel increasingly exposed to penetration and
because the subject's head in facing down drooling may also occur.
With the breasts pointing towards the floor, the use of nipple clamps,
possibly with weights attached, can be used to stimulate the subject
with pain. The strappado bondage is most commonly used with the
victim's feet on the ground. Very rarely will someone use technique with
their feet off the ground, because of the pain that follows it.
Uses of this position This type of BDSM play, due to the
difficulty of maintaining this position, does not allow for long periods
of being bound. Its major use is for sexual play with the bound subject.
While bound like this, the subject is open to the use of various tools
such as floggers, whips, etc, as well as general spanking. This position
can also be used for sexual intercourse, or the use of vibrators and/or
dildos to stimulate the bound person. Visual appeal In
strappado bondage, those who enjoy the aesthetics of BDSM cite
particular appeal in the emphasised buttocks, as well as the breasts
appearing enlarged as a result of them hanging from the chest with the
subject bending forwards. Precautions and safety This
bondage position is also used as a form of torture, therefore measures
are usually taken to ensure that the subject bound in this position is
not pushed beyond their physical capabilities. Any position that moves
limbs into an extreme position and holds them there for an extended
period of time can result in damage - sometimes permanent - to even the
most flexible of people.
Suspension bondage (vertical,
horizontal, inverted) Suspension bondage is a form of sexual bondage
where a bound person is hung from one or more overhead suspension
points.
Suspension bondage is considered to carry a higher
risk than other forms of sexual bondage.
Stimulation In partial suspension the person is
bound in way that part of their body weight is held by suspension ropes,
cables or chains. The classic partial suspension position is to have the
person balancing on one foot with part of their weight supported through
a chest harness and the other leg pulled up in some direction. A person
lying on their upper back with legs tied upwards to a suspension point
to pull their lower back off the ground would also qualify as partial
suspension. In full suspension the person is completely supported by
suspension ropes, cables or chains, and they have no contact with the
ground. The position of the person's body in a full suspension is only
limited by their endurance and the skill of the binder. The main
effect of suspension bondage is to create a heightened sense of
vulnerability and inescapability, as the subject is made to feel that by
attempting to free themselves they may fall and hurt themselves, thus
also creating a form of mental bondage in addition to the physical one
that holds them. Being suspended, especially in a large open space, also
creates a sense of objectification, submissiveness and erotic
helplessness for the subject, which can be erotically stimulating for
them and for those observing them. Rope suspension is sometimes done as
performance art at BDSM conventions and fetish-themed nightclubs.
Three main positions The three main positions are vertical,
horizontal and inverted.
Vertical suspension This primarily involves the person
being lifted from the ground by their wrists. This is usually achieved
by use of rope or by special suspension cuffs. When using rope, extreme
damage can be caused to the soft tissues of the wrists, as well as
reducing circulation, so being suspended by ropes can only normally be
achieved for a very short period of time. Often in fiction and movies a
person may be pictured hanging from metal cuffs or handcuffs. This is
possible, although extremely painful and will leave deep marks in the
wrists. The safest and "most comfortable" method of suspension by the
wrists is to use suspension cuffs as they are specifically designed to
spread the weight around the wrist as much as possible. An
alternative method of vertical suspension is to use a bondage rope
harness. With the ropes tied around the body and in particular around
the upper arms close to the shoulders as well as around the upper leg
and through the groin, it is possible to suspend a person with ropes
attached to these areas similar to the way a parachute is attached to a
person. In this position the arms and legs may be left to hang free, as
the person would have great difficulty getting free without assistance.
Horizontal suspension This position has the subject bound
in a horizontal position, sometimes face up but usually face down. The
body is lifted into this position either by attaching bondage equipment
to the ends of the limbs, or by securing bondage equipment to various
areas of the body, or a mixture of both. When just by the limbs, ropes
or suspension cuffs are attached to the wrists and ankles, with the
subject weight born by these areas, the limbs may be brought together
forming a hogtie position, or kept apart. When the body itself is used
to suspend the person, they may first be tied into a conventional
bondage position first such as a hogtie or ball tie, then by attaching
ropes or chains to certain ropes under areas of the body able to take
weight the person is lifted into the air.
Inverted suspension Being suspended upside down can be a very
hard position to maintain as a result of the position causing the blood
to rush to the head. This means that this position probably can't be
maintained for any length of time and can even lead to the person
blacking out. To be suspended in this position, ropes or suspension
cuffs are used to lift the person into the air by their ankles.
Unlike when a person is suspended by their wrists, rope suspension
around the ankles can be maintained for much longer as the ankle region
naturally is able to take far more weight and stress than the wrists.
This is especially so if boots are used as the ropes can run around the
outside surface of the boot thus protecting the skin from damage. The
person may be suspended with their legs together, or held apart either
by using a suspension spreader bar or by securing the ankles to two
separate locations. With the legs held in this position, the subject may
have an increased sense of vulnerability as their genital region would
be easily accessible. A variation on this position is to tie rope to the
wrists and pull the arms up behind the person, securing the rope to
either the suspension spreader bar or to a securing point between the
two legs, resulting in what is called a suspension bow. In this
position, if the subject is a female, her breasts would be pointing
almost straight down, depending on the strictness of the position, and
nipple clamps and weights can be added for painful stimulation. The
clamps may alternatively be secured to a point on the floor, limiting
the subject's ability to struggle or move at all without causing pain.
Risks The danger most often
associated with suspension bondage, over and above the usual risks
inherent in bondage, is falling; whether due to a weak suspension point,
faulty equipment or poor technique. Inverted positions are especially
hazardous in this regard since a head-first fall of only a few inches
can kill or paralyze a person. Less obvious dangers include nerve
compression and resulting damage, circulation problems and fainting, and
the recently-recognized harness hang syndrome. Harness hang syndrome
appears to relate to suspension with the legs below the heart, as in the
case when someone is suspended in a standing position, with no weight on
their legs. Extracting a person safely out of suspension bondage can be
difficult if they are unconscious, or if a winch or hoist jams.
Suspension tops will often work with spotters who can help get the
person down in an emergency.
Suspension bow A suspension bow is a
form of suspension bondage where the subject is suspended in the
inverted (upside down) position bent backwards into a bow. To achieve
this, they are suspended with their legs apart (sometimes with a
suspension spreader bar) and with a rope tied to the wrists pulling the
arms up behind the person, securing the rope either to the spreader bar
or to a securing point between the two legs. Suspension cuffs may be
used in place of the rope, as a large amount of stress is placed on the
wrists in this position. If the subject is a female, then, in this
position, her breasts would be pointing almost straight down (depending
on the strictness of the position), and nipple clamps and weights can be
added for painful stimulation. The clamps may alternatively be secured
to a point on the floor, limiting the subject's ability to struggle or
to move at all without causing pain.
Back to top |
Japanese bondage
Shibari (縛り, a Japanese bondage style, also called Kinbaku and Nawa
shibari)
Shibari (しばり, Shibari?) is a Japanese word that literally means "to tie"
or "to bind". It is used in Japan to describe the artful use of twine to
tie objects or packages. Kinbaku (緊縛, Kinbaku?) is the word for
"bondage" or Kinbaku-bi which means "beautiful bondage". Kinbaku (also
Sokubaku) is a Japanese style of sexual bondage or BDSM which involves
tying up the bottom using simple yet visually intricate patterns,
usually with several pieces of thin rope (generally 6mm or 8mm). The
word Shibari came in to common use in the west at some point in the
1990s to describe the bondage art Kinbaku.
Differences from Western styles
Japanese Bondage is said to differ from Western bondage in that, instead
of just immobilizing or restraining the bottom, the bottom gains
pleasure from being under the pressure and strain of the ropes,
squeezing the breasts or genitals—though there are examples found among
Western bondage enthusiasts such as John Willie. The main difference is
that Western full-body bondage uses long lengths of rope early on cotton
rope, later in the 1980s or 1990s nylon become popular, later
still—around 2000—and multi-filament polypropylene (MFP) ropes, became
popular for some; as opposed to Japanese bondage which uses multiple
pieces of natural vegetable fiber rope (hemp, jute, or linen) of 7
meters. Traditional Kinbaku uses no knots whatsoever. Modern Japanese
inspired bondage as practiced in the West also uses relatively simple
knots (requiring only about two to five types of knots), while western
bondage enthusiasts tend to favor more complex knots.
The aesthetics of the bound person's position are also important: in
particular, Japanese bondage is notorious for its use of asymmetric
positions to heighten the psychological impact of bondage.
History
Although some of the techniques of Japanese sexual bondage originated
with the military restraint technique of Hojojutsu, sexual bondage
techniques are far gentler, and great care is taken to avoid injury.
Many rope artists have derived their own flavor of Japanese-inspired
bondage which often mixes some Shibari techniques with other forms of
bondage.
Kinbaku is greatly influenced by the Sengoku period of Japan. One of
Japan's darkest historical eras of torture and execution, it is still
remembered for cruel means and methods that include the use of fire,
knives, tattoos, rocks, boiling water, divining blocks and rocking
horses, etc.
Eventually (in 1742) the Tokugawa government created a foundation of
crime laws, which included the seven different types of punishment
(Labour, slavery, exile, death, etc) and the four kinds of torture
(whip, pressing stone, constriction by rope, and hanging by rope).
According to several sources, bondage as a sexual activity first came to
notice in Japan in the late Edo period. Generally recognized as "father
of Kinbaku" is Ito Seiu, who started studying and researching Hojojutsu
in 1908 and turned it into an art form. Kinbaku became widely popular in
the 1950s in magazine form (some sources to some extent credit influence
from John Willie with popularizing Kinbaku). In the 1960s, a tradition
of bondage as a form of performance art developed in Japan.
In recent years Japanese style ropework has become popular in the
western BDSM scene.
Technique
Example of a Karada pattern. Traditional Kinbaku is based on fairly
specific rope patterns, most of them derived from Hojojutsu ties. Of
particular importance are the Ushiro Takatekote (a type of arm box tie),
which forms the basis of most Kinbaku ties, and the Ebi, or "Shrimp",
which was originally designed as a torture tie but today makes the
bottom vulnerable for more pleasant forms of play.
Generally, traditional Kinbaku is practiced with ropes of 7 meters (23
feet) in length. Due to the generally different physique of Western
bottoms, 8 meter (26 feet) ropes are commonly used in the West. The rope
material is usually hemp or jute (neither sisal nor manila hemp are
usually useful), prepared according to specific techniques to achieve a
pleasantly soft yet sturdy rope. Other materials are also sometimes
used, although most synthetic ropes tend to be too slippery for Shibari
techniques.
For historic reasons, Kinbaku uses very few knots, sometimes none at
all, or only a lark's head or an overhand knot. This requires rope with
high friction. According to Sensei Nawa Yumio in his 1964 classic book
on Torinawa, knots on a person was regarded as extremely disgraceful,
something some would regard as worse than death. Restraints with no
knots were not considered "bondage" and there was no shame in such;
therefore, "wrappings" were used.
Shinju (BDSM)
Shinju (from the Japanese meaning pearl) is a word used euphemistically
in Japanese of the female breast. It is also popularly used as the name
of a type of female halter top in the clothing industry.
It has been popularly claimed that "shinju" is an authentic Japanese
term for a breast bondage tie. The tie is usually shown to be something
similar to what in the west bondage is called a "bikini harness". See
Illustrated Tie [1] There is however, no such tie called a "shinju"
found in historic or present "Kinbaku" (Japanese Bondage). The word was
erroneously applied to Japanese Rope Bondage in Europe in the mid-1990s
by commercial websites.
The basic or foundational Kinbaku form of binding the arms and breasts
is known as the "Ushiro Takatekote"; which is to bind the arms behind
(ushiro) the back in a box arm position (takate kote). This basic box
arm tie originally found in the samurai martial art of Hojōjutsu (捕縄術)
or Nawajutsu, (縄術) evolved into its erotic usage at the end of the 19th
century and early 20th century, and is foundational to most other
Kinbaku ties.
Asymmetric bondage
Asymmetric bondage is a type of sexual bondage in which the bound person
is tied in asymmetric positions. This has a disorienting effect,
confusing the body's self-image and sense of balance, and hence
increasing the psychological impact of the bondage. Asymmetric bondage
is a common technique in Japanese bondage.
A common technique is to make the person stand on one foot and bind the
other leg, for example with an ankle to thigh bind.
Back to top |
Negotiation (BDSM)
Negotiation in BDSM community is a form of communication where
participants make arrangements on each others' requirements,
responsibilities and limits to find the best possible agreement.
As BDSM is sexual practice that keeps to SSC philosophy, negotiation is
necessary to set sexual activity within the boundaries of these
principles.
Activity within BDSM relationships requires trust, openness about most
practices that may include risks. On the other hand, partners have
certain needs which should be clearly defined in order to be properly
satisfied. In this regard, negotiation is essential part not only when
parties were not familiar with each other but also in case when partners
have long-term relationships.
Negotiation may not only concern a particular session but touch upon a
more wide range of subjects on a BDSM philosophy in general:
considerations on a lifestyle, the perspectives of the relationships,
religious beliefs and many other issues that can be in one way or
another connected to BDSM activity.
Negotiation within the limits of BDSM practice can be performed either
verbally or in written form. One of the most common ways to clarify all
the issues concerning participation in BDSM activity is to make use of
negotiation form.
Negotiation form form is a list of needs, limits and activities within
BDSM practice presented to both participants for a specification of the
details of BDSM session.
Types of negotiation
1. Scene negotiation
takes place before the actual participation in BDSM session, during the
session and after it. It can be done in written form, where all the
topics discussed will be listed for agreement or disagreement. This is
made to evaluate the possible productivity of the session and
compatibility of both partners.
Negotiation on a pre-scene phase may include discussing such things
as:
Arrangement of Roles - who will take the part of the top partner or
bottom partner, and participation of any other observers, the way
partners address each other;
Expectations and needs of both partners - likes and dislikes of
submissive and dominant partners and the ability to fulfill each other's
needs;
Limits of the scene - boundaries that are set to define what experience
is acceptable within psychological (such as humiliation, obedience or
verbal violation) and physical limits (such as pain, marks and
resistance to various influences);
Types of play - practices that would be included in a scene: bondage,
role-playing, spanking or sensory deprivation;
BDSM Gear and attire - what materials, adult toys and fetish wear will
be used;
Duration of the scene - at what time the game starts and ends, who will
be in charge of the time;
Health concerns - talking over existent health problems: allergies,
chronic diseases, STD's, taking any medications and other;
Safety measures - any safety tools to prevent situations when something
goes wrong;
Sexual contact - what type of sexual activity is accepted if any;
Safe words - one or set of verbal and non-verbal signs that will be used
to stop the play or slow it down.
Negotiation that takes place after session is focused mainly on the
following: possible drawbacks or otherwise positive moments, feelings
and suggestions on the next sessions.
2. Relationships negotiation
is a form of negotiation that concerns consideration of building up a
scene relationship or a more committed 24/7 relationships. Partners who
are interested in long-term relationships sign up a kind of contract
that is similar to one a couple signs when getting married. Together
with the questions that concern BDSM activity, partners discuss
long-term arrangements: type of relationship, agreement on living
together, financial and psychological responsibilities. When both
parties agree on TPE relationships they usually agree on signing up a
contract in support of their commitment to BDSM lifestyle and each
other. Such contracts do not have a legal base but they allow partners
to determine all the aspects of their lifestyle more clearly.
See the example of a negotiation form below:
Example of a negotiation
form: (Also called a contract)
1. General information
about your partner
Name (nickname) ____________________
Age ________
Marital status __________
Address ____________________________ |
2. The way of addressing
the other
Master (Mistress) __
slave __
pet __
others _________________________ |
3. Roles
Dom __
Sub __ |
4. Participants
number of participants __
observer (if any) _________________ |
5. Psychological needs
humiliation __
pain __
verbal abuse __
control __
embarrassment __
mind play __ |
6. Outfit
sensual wear __
fetish attire __
costumes __
undressed __
erotic jewelry __
other preferences __ |
7. Sex toys
Vibrators __
Dildos __
Anal toys __
BDSM toys
Bondage __________________________
(cuffs, rope, spreader bars,
suspension devices, harness etc)
Sensory deprivation
(gags, blindfolds, hoods, masks)
Discipline devices ___________________
(paddles, floggers, nipple clamps,
cock rings, chastity devices) |
8. Discipline
_____________________________
(spanking, flogging, hot wax
play,
pain play, cock and ball torture etc)
Sensory deprivation
_____________________________
(gagging, blindfolding,
ear plugging, mummification)
Knife play __
Blood play __
Fire play __
Hot wax play __
Role-playing etc. ________________ |
9. Health concerns
allergies __
STD's __
contraception __
general health problems __
medications taken ________________
medical aids __
safety measures _________________ |
10. Type of play:
Bondage: ______________________
Bondage positions _______________
(standing, lying, suspended,
kneeling, etc)
Parts of the body restrained
_______________________________
(ankles, hands, knees,
elbows) |
11. Limits
Physical limits ___________________
Psychological limits _______________ |
12. Marks
Acceptable __
unacceptable __ |
13. Safe words
Safe words for slowing down _____________
Safe words to stop the game _____________
Non-verbal signs ______________________ |
14. Experience
For top __
For bottom __ |
15. Materials
leather __
metal __
tape __
rope etc __ |
16. Sexual preferences
anal sex (including rimming,
analingus) __
fisting __
masturbation __
oral sex __
no sexual intercourse __
kissing __ |
|
Time, date and place
where the scene will be held: |
|
|
BDSM &
Fetishes
1. International Classification of Diseases (ICD)
2. Jacob Obafẹmi Kẹhinde Olupọna, Inc NetLibrary. 2004. Beyond
Primitivism Indigenous Religious Traditions and Modernity. Routledge.
ISBN 041527320X
3. Richard Von Krafft-Ebing. 1886. Phychopathia Sexualis.
4. a b c S. Freud: Fetischismus. Essay, 1927
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Sexual_fetishism
References: (About BDSM)
1. compare e.g. Phillip Miller, Molly Devon, William A. Granzig : Screw
the Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of
Sadomasochism., Page 55, Mystic Rose Books 1995, ISBN 0-9645960-0-8
2. Bill Henkin, Sybil Holiday: Consensual Sadomasochism : How to Talk
About It and How to Do It Safely, Page 64, Publisher: Daedalus
Publishing Company 2006, ISBN 1881943127
3. VICSS / Difference between Abuse and Power Exchange by the NLA, Dutch
SM Media Information Center and Powerrotics. Retrieved on 2007-12-10.
4. Rack vs. SSC. Within Reality (2003). Retrieved on 2006-11-13.
5. Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy: The New Topping Book, Greenery Press
(CA) 2002, ISBN 1-890159-36-0
6. Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy: The New Topping Book. Page 72,
Greenery Press (CA) 2002, ISBN 1-890159-36-0
7. Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Page 47, Greenery
Press (CA) 1998,
8. Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy: The New Topping Book. Page 71,
Greenery Press (CA) 2002,
9. e.g. Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Page 54
10. Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Page 305
11. compare David Stein: S/M’s Copernican Revolution:From a Closed World
to the Infinite Universe and Safe Sane Consensual: The Evolution of a
Shibboleth available at s/m-leather history
12. Bill Henkin, Sybil Holiday: Consensual Sadomasochism : How to Talk
About It and How to Do It Safely, Pages 80-94, Daedalus Publishing
Company 1996, ISBN 1881943127
13. Deborah Cameron, Don Kulick: Language and Sexuality, Page 24,
Cambridge University Press 2003, ISBN 0521009693
14. e.g. Joseph W. Bean: Flogging, Greenery Press (CA), 2000, ISBN
1890159271
15. see jack Rinella: The Toybag Guide Series, Greenery Press (CA), e.g.
The Toybag Guide to Hot Wax and Temperature Play, ISBN 1890159573
16. see Arne Hoffmann, Das Lexikon des Sadomasochismus. Der
Inside-Führer zur dunklen Erotik: Praktiken und Instrumente, Personen
und Institutionen, Literatur und Film, Politik und Philosophie., Page
42, Schwarzkopf & Schwarzkopf 2000, ISBN 3-896-022-903(German)
17. compare Phillip Miller, Molly Devon, William A. Granzig : Screw the
Roses, Send Me the Thorns: The Romance and Sexual Sorcery of
Sadomasochism., PP. 95, Mystic Rose Books 1995, ISBN 0-9645960-0-8
18. see Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Pages 316, ISBN
0963976389
19. see Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Pages 316
20. see Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy: The New Topping Book. Page 111
21. Matthias T. J. Grimme: Das Bondage-Handbuch. Anleitung zum
erotischen Fesseln. Charon-Verlag, Hamburg 1999, ISBN
3-931406-16-4.(German)
22. Lee Harrington: Shibari You Can Use: Japanese Rope Bondage and
Erotic Macramé, Mystic Productions 2007, ISBN 061514490X
23. Jay Wiseman: Jay Wiseman's Erotic Bondage Handbook, Greenery Press
(CA) 2000, ISBN- 1890159131
24. e.g. Christina Abernathy: Miss Abernathy's Concise Slave Training
Manual, Greenery Press (CA), 1998, ISBN 0963976397
25. Bill Henkin, Sybil Holiday: Consensual Sadomasochism : How to Talk
About It and How to Do It Safely, Page 71. Daedalus Publishing Company,
1996, ISBN 1881943127
26. Goldberg, Jeff (1988). Anatomy of a Scientific Discovery. Bantam
Books, 1988. ISBN 0553346318; ISBN 0553176161 (British edition); ISBN
0553052616
27. Fries, DS (2002). Opioid Analgesics. In Williams DA, Lemke TL.
Foye's Principles of Medicinal Chemistry (5 ed.). Philadelphia:
Lippincott Williams & Wilkins. ISBN 0-683-30737-1
28. Burke, E:"Pain and Pleasure", 'Harvard Classics',1909-1914
29. William Brame, Gloria Brame: Different Loving: The World of Sexual
Dominance and Submission (Paperback),Villard , 1996, ISBN 0679769560
30. Claudia Varrin: The Art Of Sensual Female Dominance: A Guide for
Women, Citadel, 2000, ISBN 0806520892
31. John Warren, Ph.D: The Loving Dominant, Greenery Press (CA), 2Rev Ed
edition 2000, ISBN 1890159204
32. Bill Henkin, Sybil Holiday: Consensual Sadomasochism : How to Talk
About It and How to Do It Safely, Daedalus Publishing Company 1996, ISBN
1881943127
33. see Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Page 278
34. Worldwide Club and Munch Directory. www.worldwidebdsm.com. Retrieved
on 2007-12-11.
35. via communities e.g. collarme [1]
36. Folsom Street Fair. Retrieved on 2007-12-11.
37. Fuentes Rodríguez, César: Mundo Gótico. (Quarentena Ediciones, 2007,
ISBN 8493389161)
38. [http://www.bccla.org/othercontent/06BDSM.pdf BCCLA Position Paper
Sexuality and Civil Rights:]. Cases involving prejudices against BDSM
practitioners. Retrieved on 2007-12-10.
39. see also: Jack_McGeorge
40. Janus, Samuel S. / Janus, Cynthia L., 1994 The Janus Report on
Sexual Behavior, Wiley, New York, ISBN 0471016144
41. a b c Elliott, Leland / Brantley, Cynthia, Sex on Campus, 1997,
Random House, New York
42. Jack McGeorge
43. Alice Schwarzer: "Weiblicher Masochismus ist Kollaboration!" from
EMMA Heft 2, 1991
44. http://www.lili.tanos.org.uk/womenspace/vaw
45. Alice Schwarzer, Emma Heft 2, 1991
46. see Gayle Rubin. Thinking Sex: Notes for a Radical Theory of the
Politics of Sexuality. In Carole S. Vance (Ed.), Pleasure and Danger:
exploring female sexuality, pp. 267–319. Routledge & Kegan Paul, Boston
1984. ISBN 0-04-440867-6
47. see also Wendy McElroy, A Woman's Right to Pornography. Saint
Martin's Press 1997, ISBN 0312152450
48. see Milton Diamond and Ayako Uchiyama Pornography, Rape and Sex
Crimes in Japan, International Journal of Law and Psychiatry 22(1):
1–22. 1999) online "Pornography, Rape and Sex Crimes in Japan":
Our findings regarding sex crimes, murder and assault are in keeping
with what is also known about general crime rates in Japan regarding
burglary, theft and such. Japan has the lowest number of reported rape
cases and the highest percentage of arrests and convictions in reported
cases of any developed nation. Indeed, Japan is known as one of the
safest developed countries for women in the world (Clifford, 1980). …
Despite the absence of evidence, the myth persists that an abundance of
sexually explicit material invariably leads to an abundance of sexual
activity and eventually rape (e.g., Liebert, Neale, & Davison, 1973).
Indeed, the data we report and review suggest the opposite. Christensen
(1990) argues that to prove that available pornography leads to sex
crimes one must at least find a positive temporal correlation between
the two. The absence of any positive correlation in our findings, and
from results elsewhere, between an increase in available pornography and
the incidence of rape or other sex crime, is prima facie evidence that
no link exists. But objectivity requires that an additional question be
asked: "Does pornography use and availability prevent or reduce sex
crime?" Both questions lead to hypotheses that have, over prolonged
periods, been tested in Denmark, Sweden, West Germany and now in Japan.
Indeed, it appears from our data from Japan, as it was evident to
Kutchinsky (1994), from research in Europe, that a large increase in
available sexually explicit materials, over many years, has not been
correlated with an increase in rape or other sexual crimes. Instead, in
Japan a marked decrease in sexual crimes has occurred.
49. Berl Kutchinsky, Pornography and Rape: Theory and Practice?
in: International Journal of Law and Psychiatry, Vol. 14, 1991, P. 47–66
50. see Pleasure, Pain, and Saddam HusseinA meditation on recreational
violence.slate.com. No Apologies: The Story Of Jack McGeorge
getunderground.com
51. a b Charles Moser, in Journal of Social Work and Human Sexuality
1988, (7;1, S.43-56)
52. Spengler, Andreas: Sadomasochisten und ihre Subkulturen, Campus
Verlag, 1979, Frankfurt am Main / New York (German)
53. Datenschlag survey (German)
54. See Eva Daschek und Axel Konrad: Empirische Untersuchung über den
Zusammenhang zwischen ausgewählten Faktoren und inklinierendem sexuellem
Sadomasochismus, online sm-study(German)
55. ncsfreedom.org
56. compare datenschlag.org (German)
57. Dossie Easton, Janet W. Hardy: The New Topping Book. Page 163
58. compare e.g. Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Pages
286-288.
59. For details on the role of women in sadomasochistic subculture
compare e.g. Breslow et al On the Prevalence and Roles of Females in the
Sadomasochistic Subculture: Report of an Empirical Study. Archives of
Sexual Behaviour 14/1985, P. 303-17. In Thomas S. Weinberg: S&M –
Studies in Dominance and Submission, (Ed.), Prometheus Books, New York,
1995 ISBN 0-8797-5-978-X
60. see e.g. Gloria G. Brame, BDSM/Fetish Sex:Overview and Study, online
gloria-brame.com
61. Brokmann, Angela: Macht und Erotik, 1996, Sexologisches Institut
e.V. Hamburg, Hamburg (German)
62. Person, Ethel S. / Terestman, Nettie / Myers, Wayne A. / Goldberg,
Eugene L. / Salvadori, Carol: Gender differences in sexual behaviors and
fantasies in a college population, 1989, in: Journal of Sex and Marital
Therapy, Bd. 15, No. 3, 1989, P. 187–198
63. Breslow, Norman: SM Research Report, v1.1, 1999
64. see Arne Hoffmann, Lexikon der Tabubrüche, Schwarzkopf&Schwarzkopf,
2003, ISBN 3896025171 (German)
65. "What's Really Happening on Campus", Playboy October 1976, S.
128-131, 160-164, 169. (see Charles Moser / Eugene E. Levitt: An
Exploratory-Descriptive Study of a Sadomasochistically Oriented Sample,
in Journal of Sex Research, Vol. 23, 1987, P. 322-337.)
66. see Thomas S. Weinberg (Ed.): S&M - Studies in Dominance and
Submission, Prometheus Books, New York 1995, ISBN-10: 087975978X
67. Walter Lowe: The Playboy Readers' Sex Survey. 1983.
68. Based on the 1983 "Playboy Readers Sex Survey" by Walter Lowe.
kinseyinstitute.org
69. Durex Global Sex Survey 2005, P.15 Online Durex Global Sex Survey
2005
70. Durex Global Sex Survey 2004, P.14 Online Durex Global Sex Survey
2004
71. ICD-10 2007
72. Letter to the Editor of The American Journal of Psychiatry: Change
in Criterion for Paraphilias in DSM-IV-TR. Russell B. Hilliard, Robert
L. Spitzer. 2002. Retrieved: 23 November, 2007.
73. * Reiersøl O, Skeid S (2006). "The ICD diagnoses of fetishism and
sadomasochism". Journal of homosexuality 50 (2-3): 243-62. PMID
16803767.
74. compare revisef65.org
75. A collection of plenty scientific studies can be found at
http://www.datenschlag.org/txt/statistik.html (German/English)
76. Fritz Morgenthaler: Homosexuality, Heterosexuality, Perversion,
Analytic, April 1988, ISBN 0881630608
77. Theodor Reik: Aus Leiden Freuden. Masochismus und Gesellschaft,
Fischer ,1983, ISBN 3596267684 (German)
78. compare Arne Hoffmann: In Leder gebunden. Der Sadomasochismus in der
Weltliteratur, Page 11, Ubooks 2007, ISBN 3866080786 (German)
79. see the detailed work of Robert Bienvenu, The Development of
Sadomasochism as a Cultural Style in the Twentieth-Century United
States, 2003, Doctoral Dissertation, Online as PDF on Sadomasochism as a
Cultural Style
80. Townsend, Larry The Leatherman's Handbook 1972 Olympia Press, 7th
edition 2004 available from L.T. Publications P.O. Box 302, Beverly
Hills, CA 90213-0302
81. compare Pat Califia (Edit.), Robin Sweeney (Edit.): The Second
Coming: A Leatherdyke Reader. Alyson Pubns, 1996, ISBN 1555832814
82. compare Gayle Rubin: Samois, Leather Times, 21:3-7., 2004, available
from: leatherarchives.org
83. compare Jay Wiseman: SM 101: A Realistic Introduction, Page 92
84. Details describing the development of the theoretical construct
"Perversion" by Krafft-Ebing and his relation to this terms, see Andrea
Beckmann, Journal of Criminal Justice and Popular Culture, 8(2) (2001)
66-95 online unter Deconstructing Myths
85. Isidor Isaak Sadger: Über den sado-masochistischen Komplex. in:
Jahrbuch für psychoanalytische und psychopathologische Forschungen, Bd.
5, 1913, S. 157–232 (German)
86. Appeals Court of Hamm in its judgement of 1 February 2006, case
number 10 UF 147/04, available online at the Portal of the North
Rhine-Westfalian Ministry of Justice (German)
87. House of Commons: Criminal Justice And Immigration Bill
88. Ayzad, BDSM - Guida per esploratori dell'erotismo estremo,
Castelvecchi, 2004 ISBN 8876150250
89. compare datenschlag.org(Oktober 2001) (German)
90. compare Interessengemeinschaft BDSM Schweiz (German)
91. "Weiblicher Masochismus ist Kollaboration!" from EMMA Heft 2, 1991
92. An extensive analysis of the magazine and Schwarzer campaigns is
available at Papiertiger#Emma (German)
93. Manuela Münchow, Bundesvereinigung Sadomasochismus: Stellungnahme
zum Grünbuch "Gleichstellung sowie Bekämpfung von Diskriminierungen in
einer erweiterten Europäischen Union" der Kommission der Europäischen
Gemeinschaften (Brüssel, den 28.05.2004 KOM(2004)379)", 31.08.2004
(German), and the detailed chronology Der Papiertiger: Presse ("media
coverage") in the Encyclopedia of Sadomasochism
Datenschlag.de(German/English)
94. compare Arne Hoffmann: In Leder gebunden. Der Sadomasochismus in der
Weltliteratur, Ubooks 2007, ISBN 3866080786 (German)
95. for further details see Linda Williams: Power, Pleasure and
Perversion: Sadomasochistic Film Pornography, Representations, Nr.27
(Summer), 1989, P.37-65, University of California Press
96. vgl. Roland Seim, Josef Spiegel (Hrsg.): "Ab 18" - zensiert,
diskutiert, unterschlagen. Beispiele aus der Kulturgeschichte der
Bundesrepublik Deutschland, Telos Verlag, Münster 2002, ISBN 393306001X,
S.109 (German).
97. compare Stern.de: H&M: Mode made by Madonna, available under
stern.de, 15.02.2007 (German) and Vogue.com: Die gezähmte Madonna,
available under Vogue.com (German)
98. see mini.ca
99. Heather Cassell: LGBT advocates offer mixed reaction to Miller,
Coors merger, online under EDGE Boston
References: Bondage (BDSM)
Friday, Nancy (1998). Men In Love. New York: Delta Trade Paperbacks.
ISBN 0-385-33342-0. (Broad informal survey of men's sexual fantasies.)
Wiseman, Jay (2000). Erotic Bondage Handbook. Oakland: Greenery Press.
ISBN 1-890159-13-1.
Midori (2001). The Seductive Art of Japanese Bondage. Oakland: Greenery
Press. ISBN 1-890159-38-7.
Master "K", 2004. Shibari, the Art of Japanese Bondage. Brussels:
Glitter. ISBN 90-807706-2-0.
Two Knotty Boys, Larry Utley, Two Knotty Boys Showing You the Ropes,
Green Candy Press, 2006. ISBN 1-931160-49-X.
Toushin, Steven 2006. "The Destruction of the Moral Fabric of America",
Wells Street Publishing. ISBN 978-1-884760-0404.
Ernulf KE, Innala SM. "Sexual bondage: a review and unobtrusive
investigation." Arch Sex Behav. 1995 Dec;24(6):631-54. PMID: 8572912
Toushin, Steven 2004. "The Puppy Papers", Wells Street Publishing, ISBN
1-884760-03-1
Toushin, Steven 2007. "Puppy's Tales". Wells Street Publishing" ISBN
978-1884760-06-8
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